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too mature for a rocknroll boyfriend?
I am 36 years old and still unmarried. I have good morals and live a family oriented domestic lifestyle. The man I am currently dating is nice but that's about it. He refuses to look for work, while I work and go to school and care for my home and children. He lives off his cousin and most recently joined a rock band at the age of 45. He is now dreaming like a young boy about his music and has now made arrangements to perform in bars. I made it clear to him on several occasions that I do not want to be with a man that hangs out in bars since i live a very domestic lifestyle. He does not care how I feel about the bars and is going to persue his rock n roll fantasy while I struggle as single working mother. it seems very unfair to me. Am I correct to break things off with him and continue to be alone at my age or am I just too cynical about bars and his passion for rock n roll? He has not made any plans with me but seems focused on the band.I fixed dinner tonight after working and going to school and he did not have time to eat the meal I prepared because of the band.
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He's just not the right partner for you.
You don't need to judge and get angry. He's prefectly entitled to go to bars and be in a band. He's an adult after all. You are simply dating him - you aren't married and he isn't treating this like a long-term, equal partnership. He's 'just dating' you.
If he isn't an adult you want to be in a relationship with, that's fine. Just tell him so.
I think you are too cynical and judgmental when it comes to bars, but that's your right too. And regardless of your opinion of bars, it's obvious that this man isn't the kind of partner you are looking for.
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you guys are obviously riding different trains to different destinations. there are plenty of guys who are actually responsible and artistic at the same time. hell, half of the bands I've seen play in Athens Georgia have been 30 somethings to babyboomers that play the music clubs on the weekends for fun, and work a regular job during the week. albeit that job may be as the owner of a musical instrument shop, record store, or even as a school music teacher... they can still jam out and go on world tours, they just plan ahead and act like a responsible adult would. ditch this dude, there's plenty of better dudes your age to go around. just go to a blues festival or something if you still want to date an artist, and ask if they have a dayjob. consider dinner as the last straw. if he gave a damn about you, he would have at least shovelled down the food you made for him. that alone is -10 character points in my book.
good luck
-Gunner
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