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how did i become a person tahat cut myself?
i know that once i was happy and loved the air going into my lungs now.. i hate the air i wanna die.. i cut myself .. i wanna know why .. why mee ... me and my mom fight so much but thats not a reson for me to do this to myself ... i wanna stop and get hep yet i cant seem to open my mouth .. whyyy.. i wanna i really do.. but im to weak i cant tell no one.. i feel like cryin just thinking about it.. i cant stay strong anymore.. i wanna die i wanna go to sleep and not wake up ...
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
I know how you are feeling. I have been there. Wanting so bad for every breath to be my last, cutting to let out the pain, crying when no one is around, but smiling when they are so they wont know how hurt I am. Feeling like the world would be better off without you, but then in another sense you want to get help you want to be better and you want to feel that happiness you once felt. Its hard and its confusing. Like your own personal hell. I know how hard it is for everyone to find out. But honestly when they know it feels so much better because you are no longer alone in this. My husband (was just my boyfriend at the time) was the first to know about the cutting. I fell asleep in his bed while he was at work and when he came home he saw blood on my clothes. The look in his face just about killed me inside. He was so hurt and felt so bad and he cried and kissed my cuts. When I saw how much he cared I knew I had to stop. Your family and friends do not want you to go through this and they dont want you to be hurting. And I know you feel like everyone hates you but they dont, they love you and some day you are going to see it. Tell your mom what is going on before its too late before you hurt yourself bad and you do die. If you dont think that you can handle walking up to her.. Write her a letter, telling her everything. Tell her you want help. And you can get help. You can beat this! I did. Good luck
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umm well what you're saying is contradiction..
you're saying you want help, but then you want to die?? that makes no sense.
Whatever you're dealing with.. you gotta stop thinking about those bad things and start thinking about the things you love. You must love yourself for other to love you. Find someone you really trust and talk to them about your problems. Unfortunately, there's no "easy way out".. just take the leap and tell them your problems. It's so much easier when you tell someone about your problems because they can really help you. Instead of feeling closed up and "secretive".. you'll feel so much more open because you know that the secrets are out and that someone can help you.
You don't have to do this alone.. there are people out there who care and who want to help.. like me. I'm always on advicenators so if you need to talk about anything, just inbox me. All of the questions are anonymous so you don't have to worry about someone recognizing who you are. You don't even have to ask any questions either.. if you just want to vent to me, that's okay too.
But I will say something, I'm proud of you. I'm proud that you took the first step and realized something needs to change. I'm proud that you are reaching out and WANTING to get help. The only thing you need to work on right now is stop thinking about all the negativity because it doesn't help you.
Oh and 1 more thing.. its really overwhelming if you look at all of your problems as a whole. So try taking baby steps. Tackle 1 problem at a time because that way it won't be so stressful and it'll be easier for you.
I'm not sure what problems you're dealing with, but like I said earlier, i'm always here if you need to talk.
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