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I don't want to lose my friend but i hate being the other woman?
there's this guy i met on a penpal site last summer in July; he's from Jamaica and when we started talking; we just clicked; we had so much in common especially since my background is jamaican as well. we talked every single day for hours on the site; we eventually started talking on the phone too almost every night. our relationship became flirty and intimate. we would talk sexual to each other; exchanged pics ; he even calls me his gf and he tells me that he wishes that i was his gf;we write letters to eachother and i started developing feelings for him and he told me he was catching feelings for me too.
The messed up thing is that he has a gf in the States who went to spend time with him in Jamaica last summer. they've been together for over a year now. we've been talking for 10 months now and he tells me he loves me but i've really started to develop real feelings for him; i can't go a day without talking to him. I've tried to end this "thing" a couple of times but we only end up fighting like bf/gf and then things go back to how they were before. I just want to get out of this because everytime i see a personal msg on msn or a status on facebook about his gf; i die a little inside and its not a good feeling. but at the same time; i don't want to lose my friend-we tell eachother everything; personal things; he's even friends with my older sister. should i try to be friends with him or cut him off completely?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You are being competitive with the girlfriend and don't want to lose, so you keep staying with it even though you got played bigtime.
Listen, for your own psychological health, you need to get out of this relationship. It is doing you no good. Meanwhile, you are losing out on chances to meet guys who would be better for you.
We can't always get what we want, kiddo. And you gotta know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em. So taking both of those tattered cliches into account, stand up for yourself and move on.
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Hun, if you are the 'other woman' then you were never actually his friend. You were always just the other woman.
Has it occurred to you this man has a pattern of behavoir? I willing to bet he met his girlfriend on a similar online site. . .
Now he has two girlfriends - which is really not a very friendly thing to do.
Stop mourning a friendship you've never actually had. It was an illusion and a con-job, a beautiful story you were able to tell yourself, as distance and ignorance kept you safe from the reality of what was happening with this man. Maybe you aren't ready to cut him off yet, but I hope you do soon. The most likely ending to this story is you being hurt - badly - by a man who will never have to face up, in person, to the damages he has done to the women in his life.
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