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I don't know what to do anymore.
My boyfriend and I just broke up. I was waiting for him to decide what he wanted and yesterday he told me he still loved me and wanted to be here for me, but he didn't want to get back together. He said he won't dump and ditch me like my past boyfriends and he still wants to be friends. I was extremely upset. He hurt me so bad. I don't even know why we broke up.
He told me he never wanted to hurt me but he did. He knew it would break my heart but he left me anyway. He kept avoiding the fact he was dumping me though. He kept telling me he wasn't totally gone. I'm grateful he wants to be here for me, but it's not the same. I can't be friends with him. I'll end up making things complicated, i.e. Jealousy, developing more feelings, sitting back watching him be happy while I'm unhappy.
He's confusing me though. He told me yesterday we could get back together as long as I do one thing for him. He wants us to be on the same page and same level of trust and love before we split. I agreed to do so but he still won't get back with me. I told him this morning face to face I didn't like all these games and confusion. He either wants me or he doesn't. I told him if he really loved me he'd get back regardless of anything. I don't deserve to go through silly mind games or anything because I have been there before and I don't want to be there again. He said he's very indifferent. He doesn't know what he wants.
I love him very much. But I don't know what to do. I told him he needs to figure out his feelings, but I won't be here forever. I really love him and I can't stand being apart.
He won't even tell me why we split either. Every time I ask and tell him I deserve to know he gets all upset. He's angry with himself for hurting me. I just want to be with him again. I need help. I don't know what to do anymore.
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He is playing mind games with you, He dumped you and now he is asking you to show a mutual respect for him?
Sometimes people break off relationships without given a reasonable explanation for it, It's just the way it goes sometimes. My advise; Move on and stop talking to him. Don't let him mess with your head because he doesn't deserve you in a relationship he sure as hell doesn't deserve you as a friend. Be the stronger one and know your better than that.
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Your ex is trying to be nice to you, but he actually being very, very mean.
Avoid him. Stop speaking to him. Face the pain of not being with him head on.
Do not let his false niceness drag out your agony.
He wants the same intimacy and closeness and trust as your ex boyfriend that he had as your boyfriend? That's insane. That's disrespectful of your feelings and it's dishonest. That isn't reality. The reality is that your relationship is over, and that means much of the closeness and trust MUST end as well.
Please. I know it's a tough thing to do. I know you probably wont do it. But opt out of this mental torture. Tell him he has had every chance to make up his mind and now you've made up yours: You can't continue like this. He's out. He's gone. He needs to respect your wishes and if you are broken up, you must BE broken up. That means no contact for a long while. Probably never a deep friendship again. That is what breaking up is. And he needs to face it. So do you.
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