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I feel lost and insane. Please take the time to read.


Question Posted Sunday January 30 2011, 2:52 am

f/16. so many things are going on especially with this guy I used to "talk" to. we were together for a little over six months. he told me he loved me. everything was great. i didn't want the whole "boyfriend. girlfriend" title because in my head i feel as if it gives him more power to hurt me even though I knew it was possible for him to hurt me because I was emotionally attached to him. recently we've been having problems. we completely stopped talking for a month. we had a talk and now we are i guess acquaintances. we both seem miserable though because we want to be together, we love each other, we just need time.
my best friend who is also friends with him, told me she feels as if she talks to him as more than a friend. she told me this while we were high. I asked her if she liked him and she said "no, I never said that" but due to the fact that I was high I went into deep thinking and somehow convinced myself that she likes him. i started having flashbacks to a few times the three of us hung out and she would try to make me look stupid in front of him. I'm not sure if I'm just over-thinking everything. I've promised to stop smoking weed, and I'm going to stick to it. I'm trying to get my life together but I don't know what to do with the guy I'm in love with. It's so confusing. I love him, he loves me but now we barely talk. I hung out with him and my best friend right after my best friend told me that stuff and we were still high so I stood quiet pretty much the whole time in fear that I would say something I would regret. I left first and I hugged him around three times because part of me kept forgetting I already hugged him and the other part didn't want to leave his side. my best friend made a comment that got me really mad. "damn, stop hugging him." he gave me another hug after the comment.
I'm very self conscious and have a really low self-esteem. I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm completely lost, I feel worthless and I don't know what to do. I have no one to talk to that I trust. My mom passed away and my dad left me a couple of years ago. I live with my grandma but we rarely talk.


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askforanswersfromAndie answered Sunday January 30 2011, 3:33 pm:
You sound like very many people i have seen before.I am very sorry. Your friend.. girls ..well people in general will say stuff to dim down the issue. No one likes to upset any one else so if she does like him she isn't going to be forward with you it seems especially if she knows how u feel, she might try to hint and kinda get you to get it with out saying or admitting it but maybe you should talk to him about that . that will take time thought. to fix any bond or relationship of any type it takes time.Life takes time. You are going to have to rebuild any trust and understanding you have between this guy. things have become distant and broken it has to be healed to get better and faced. Try just having small conversation every so often talk about good times go do stuff just you and him or u and him and some other mutual... nice.. non threatening friends or siblings or something. just talk.. when you can just talk to some one about what ever no stress no awkwardness no worry, it can mean the world and fix so much for 2 people it creates strong bonds and makes it so that people wana do it again. just... give your self time and go slow and don't forget to take care of your self you need to watch your emotions and see from an out side view of whats going on and what your facing. some times our own opinions are altered or blinded. I hope that helped at least a little

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AskSinz answered Sunday January 30 2011, 10:58 am:
Hey im also f/16 and my friend is going through the same things as you are expect its with a girl. The first thing that you have to do is kinda part youself from him so you can lose the emotional attachment. I mean i understand that you do love him but to give each other time means you have the time to re-evaluate whats going on in your life and make changes. I'm in a relationship and i had a huge emotional attachment we took a break for a bit and i tried to stay strong and we talked through our problems and in the process that it took for me to make sure I was strong which was to just go back to the days before we were together. Which was when i could deal without talking to her for more than a day. Then after that happens you don't become detached from him. You just become less clingy and less deep in the emotion so you can see whats going on. My friend smokes weed to and is trying to cut down, and it's reall good that you want to do this. Because it can have really bad long term effects on you and one of those is paranoia which you could be going through. What you need to do is talk to him like your friends again do the whole getting to know them all over again process and just chill out. You'll soon get a sense of purpose again. As for your mum passing away i'm really sorry to hear that, but im sure she wouldnt want you throwing your life away. If it helps you can talk to her before you go to sleep. Just let a little out at night if you believe she's watching over you. Just as you live with your grandparents so does my mate. She always has really low points and it can be difficult to bring her back up from those but you just got to think, you have friends, you have a life, and you begun a love life. Your childhood makes you hold on to what amazing times you have with people that you love and you just have to ease your grip a little. You can inbox me if you want to talk more because I am more than happy to help. I really do hope this helps, please don't hesitate to ask any other questions. Hope this helps xx

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