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College Lonliness
Hey I'm a second semester freshman and I'm just really not happy here. I came into college with the notion that I would make friends, everyone would be open to being your friend, and all of that crap. However, I was dead wrong when I went through my first semester of college realizing that one can actually end up friendless in college. And I did what society said to do when you don't make friends: "join clubs", "put yourself out there" and blah blah blah. I'm currently in my second semester and nothing has changed. I'm just depressed and would like some feedback from you because I read a post by you in 2006 to someone who was in my shoes and it was VERY inspirational.
Currently, I'm embracing being alone because I'm sick and tired of beating myself up and doing a 360 just to make friends. I don't feel the effort is worth it.
Please, I would love to hear feedback from you.
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Hi there,
The user you wrote this to doesn't allow questions from people who don't have an account.
Please go here:
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... and sign up to ask them again.
You may copy and paste this question into a new one once you have your account.
I would also suggest asking this question to the public here once you have an account, as there are many people in college or recently out of college who will be able to help you.
Just a note from personal experience:
Any "friend" you have to go out and recruit isn't really a friend.
All the things you are doing to make friends... well, if you haven't, find clubs and activities that you truly enjoy. Things you would be doing if there weren't other people involved just because you love the things that much.
This way you will meet people who truly share your interests, and it is much more likely you will find a kindred spirit.
If you are: "...beating myself up and doing a 360 just to make friends..." then you aren't enjoying what you are doing, and people know that. People don't want to be friends with someone who is busy beating themselves up and doing 360s if you get my drift. ;-)
Another thing about making friends is that we are all shy to an extent. If you aren't shy, the other person might be. Overcoming this is #1 in success in most things in life.
I found a video that I think is fabulous for overcoming things that keep us from making friends. Please watch this:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
... it is fun, hilarious, and very helpful all at the same time.
Good luck, and I hope you find time to make an account here. Maybe you can spend some time helping others through this site. We would love to have you here.
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