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he said a lot of hurtful things but now i'm the whore
i was talking to a guy for about 5 months, let's call him Oscar. in that time i lost my virginity to him, i thought it brought us closer by the way we were around one another. he told me he loved me. about two weeks ago i find out from a mutual friend that he's been saying he's "done" with me multiple times since the first time we had intercourse. she said it doesn't sound like he means it since he always talks good about me to other people. he doesn't know i know about the "done" part. he was acting like a jerk that whole week and then he asked me if we can hang out because it's been a while since we've done it, i obviously said no (it was after i found out what he said) and then i noticed one of his friends started coming around me more. yesterday i found out that his friend (let's call him Anthony) asked Oscar if we were still talking before Oscar even asked me to hang out and he said no and gave anthony permission to ask me out (Oscar also doesn't know i know this either) Oscar wasn't at school yesterday and Anthony kept flirting with me but i thought nothing of it i even started bringing up Oscar. well anthony ended up asking me out and for some reason i said yes (very stupid move) nobody knows we're dating, they think we're just talking. Oscar said he was okay with it. Today Oscar came and looked very serious, he talked to Anthony but I avoided him all day because part of me is mad at him. he had his other friend ask if we were dating and all they did was sit there and talk about us the whole period. i like Anthony as a person but i don't see him in that way. he's already trying to introduce me to his family but I know I still have a lot of feelings for Oscar. I told Anthony I was going to talk to Oscar but he said it would only make everything worse. I'm so lost. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to make things better. I don't think it's even possible. I wanted to be with Oscar but I don't think it would work anymore since his friends hate me and he's been "done" with me. everybody only knows the bad stuff i did, no one knows anything he said or the way he was acting. i know you guys would probably just say "break up with anthony" but it's not that easy. What should I do about everything?
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You know Oscar isn't really a good guy. Even though he may say nice things and all that, it feels like he's messing with you right? It really looks like that in everyone else's eyes too. You know about the things he said. He doesn't think you know and he thinks he can keep messing around with you. I get that you still have huge feelings for Oscar and everything but you need to try to move on. You need to find someone else that you have interest in.
Maybe you got with Anthony because you wanted to get over Oscar? Or to make him jealous? Either way, you don't like Anthony like that and you need to let him go too. I know it's not easy but I've been in the same place as you. I dated a guy who had more feelings for me than I did for him. I don't know why I stayed with him because I did like him, just as a person. I didn't have real feelings for him. So, let him go now before it hurts him even more in the long run. Good luck!
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First of all after a guy has sex with you and then repeated says that he wants to be done with you, dump him. Obviously he is an ass and doesn't want to be commited. Why on earth would you be treated like that by someone who claims he loves you? That is my question, think real long on it.
Don't torture anthony if you don't find feelings for him. Let him move on! He is probably getting his hopes up, because he likes you, and then you don't like him. Soo...leave them both. You shouldn't have cheated on oscar, obviously. :) but, i understand. Move on away from them. You and anthony deserve better.
Good luck!
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