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IM a girl WHat to do Im confused.
I hate being a girl. ABsolutely despise it. I hate hate getting a period I hate having boobs and I hate having a vagina. I love to wear jeans and a baggy tee and in summer baggy shorts with baggy tee. I feel uncomfortable being a girl. I do love men everything about them. PLease Help me what should I do? By the way sex change is not an option.
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Edited Answer: I’m taking the time to edit my answer to you with some trepidation. I say this as I have the feeling that you are at this time confused and mad at the world; this fine you have every right to feel any way you wish as long as you can support those reasons which you have. I am taking this position based on the rating you gave to my answer. I am one of the highest rated advisors, as well as one of the oldest on this website. I chose to answer questions like yours for the same reason I have joined as an advisor: I feel it is important for young people like you to get straight answers to their question. When necessary I will research my answers and pass along the websites found on to the person whose question I am answering.
That being said; as I said in regards to a bra. If you are big breasted it is for your own health that you find a proper sized bra to wear. If you don’t wear a bra you will have health problems later in life related to your breast and breast muscles; no I am not talking specifically about Breast Cancer, the two issues are not as I am told related. You would also fall into the normal range of young teenage girls who don’t like wearying bras. Sorry, but that is a fact of life, most girls do not like going from undershirts to bras and fight their mothers tooth and nail over it.
As far as religion is concerned; you have your faith and I would never take issue with someone over their faith. I can see where you might be conflicted over this; if I am right you may want to think about talking to your minister, pastor or priest. I’m really not sure what position the church has on the issue of sex change. It is always best to check your thoughts with the person that has the best authoritative answer.
I reread you question and my answer. As I said my answer was a shot in the dark as I didn’t know your age. Now that I do know age I will say this and please don’t bite my head off (figuratively speaking), I am trying to inform not instruct. The early teenage years are very confusing for both boys and girls. Besides growing into young adults and still being treated as children, your bodies are changing and you are experiencing things you have never felt before. Some girls look forward to the day when they have breast and get their period, others like you hate it when it happens. Some girls change and accept what has happened and some do not
To my way of thinking it is still too early to finalize just who and what you are. I base this on your statement “I do love men everything about them”. This statement is just enough of a contradiction to tell me you need to be given more time to find out just who you are. You may still change and conform to what society finds acceptable to what a women should be, if you decide not to conform, no big deal. This is your life; once you are of legal age anyone in authority over you who tell you that you must conform; you have every right to tell them what you think of conformists. Of course be prepared to suffer consequences such as job losses.
Until you are of legal age you must expect that you will be pushed to conform, that is just the way life is. There is nothing you can do about your periods, your breasts or your vagina until you are at least 18 and decide if you want to have a sex change. Until then try not to punish everyone around you with how you feel. It is not their fault or yours for how you feel it is just a part of growing up. I’ve been through this before with one of my nieces who felt as you do at your age. She turned out to be a conformist and is being married in April.
It would help to know how old you are, without knowing your age answering your question is hard. As someone old enough to be your grandfather I try by taking a stab at some grandfatherly advice.
For a young girl who has been a tomboy all her life to suddenly have to deal with the differences in the body of a woman this can be very troubling and confusing. This usually begins when puberty begins when your body starts to change and you develop the curves and bust line of a woman. Suddenly your boy friends' start to treat you differently; instead of asking you to play baseball they want to kiss and hug and try and feel you up.
As for your period I have a news flash for you; I have yet to meet a woman who loves her period. Periods are painful, messy and can be embarrassing if you are not prepared for them when they arrive.
Like I said I'm taking a stab in the dark here but if this sounds like you; you're normal. You like boys and you don't want a sex change. Is this something you will grow out of? I really can't say as this is something that is up to you. There is nothing that says you have to conform to what everyone thinks a woman should look like or dress like. You want to wear baggy clothes do it, don't worry what those 2 on "What not to wear" think. The only caution I would give is if you are big busted wear a bra as it is for your own good.
Other than that this is your life, live it as you please. As long as you do not break any legal laws you can break all the laws of convention you wish.
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I'm not sure how old you are or what exactly you mean, but I'll try and guess a bit.
As the other girl said before, you don't have to dress and act or even look like a 'girl'. They're just social conventions and imaginary rules that don't exist. Dress however you like, act however you like. There is nothing wrong with looking and dressing differently, and there is certainly nothing wrong with looking more like a boy when you're a girl.
When you say you hate your boobs and vagina, why do you hate them? Do you hate them because you feel uncomfortable trying to dress and act like a girl? Do you hate the way they look? Do you hate them because you want to have male organs like a penis? Or is it another reason?
If it's the because they make you feel uncomfortable, try not to think too much about them. Your genitals don't make you who you are, your personality and the person you are on the inside do.
If it's because you hate the way they look, you're just feeling how every girl feels sometimes, and that is self conciousness. No one loves every part of their body, and no one has perfect breasts or a nice looking vagina. But you need to know that however you look, however your body is, you and your body are both beautiful. Soemtimes we just need to keep telling ourselves that until we believe it.
If it's because you want to have male organs and a male body, then I think you should open up to your family. If you don't feel comfortable talking to them, go to a teacher or your school councellor and have a talk to them. If you still feel upset about this, then still go to that councellor or teacher or family member and talk to them. They can help you and they always will.
It's wonderful to be different, every one is and more people should embrace it. Be who you want to be and look how you want to look!
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Dear confused ,
Hello i hate many things about being a girl too im a girl just in case and what i hate about it that having boobs and a periods and i love boiis Well my opinon is that maybe you should settle down and write a letter to ur self not towards no one what you like about your self on one side and what u dont save it and maybe a year later i could change your opion theirs lots of girls that want bigger boobs ..But what girl likes too get thier period noo in fact 96% hate it and the other dosnt really mind well my sudgestion y not be diffrent to say more i where baggy dark clothes with skinny jeans and shoes i hate high heals ..Dress differnt be defrent you are diffrent ...
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