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just friends. pros & cons of hooking up?
i [19f] definitely, absolutely, certainly only like him [20m] as a friend. and i am as close to certain as i can possibly be about him also only liking me as a friend. i'm not into friends-with-benefits relationships. he's tried to hook up with me before and i said no, but sometimes when we cuddle he'll hug me just right and i'll want it so badly.. we hooked up once before leaving for winter break, and we've talked every day since leaving. i do not want to be more than friends but sometimes i really, really want to hook up with him.. thoughts? what should i do?
i realize that the constant texting and skyping is bad, so my new rule has been that i can't initiate the conversation. the texting has slowed significantly but the skyping not so much..
it's just that i always tell myself i don't want to hook up with him, i shouldn't hook up with him, but then when i think about it i really want to, physically. heeelp
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If you definitley, absolutely, certainly only like him as a friend, then you shouldn't be leading him on. It's only going to cause problems for the both of you.
So if you aren't hardcore denying your feelings for him for some reason or another, then don't hook up with him again.
Sometimes it's nice just to cuddle with someone and feel affectionate with someone. Sometimes it's lonliness and other times it makes us feel good inside that someone wants to be around us in that way. But it's not healthy. Everybody feels like hooking up with someone that they don't have genuine feelings for, but you need to use some self control and just not do it.
I guess for pros, the feeling is nice (feeling of affection and closeness to another human being, and the feeling of being attractive).
The cons, the feeling is momentary and fleeting. It'll go and you'll want it again.
If you aren't into friends-with-benefits relationships, then you shouldn't continue this.
So just to end, it's so normal to feel the physical urge to hook up with someone that you shouldn't or that you only like as a friend, but you have to use your will power to stop yourself.
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It seems like you want to hook up with him, but you know its not the best thing to do. But just know if you do end up hooking up with him, always use a condom(: if you really think you like him, I would go for it, but if your not sure, then I would wait a little while.
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