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What is fake and what is real?
I'll start my story:
Been friends with this guy since highschool. He's very insensitive, a future pastor, a smarty pants whom girls adore.
He and I had same issues with our exes: they were so possessive and jealous.
So last year after we had breakups with our exes, we decided to fake a relationship so that our friends would stop worrying about us. It's been 11 months, and it's been going wow despite long distance.
He really treats me like real girlfriend, so sometimes I get confused: this is fake, but it feels so real.
Our best friends have been telling us to make it real, they go "make it official, go for real relationship! you guys are there already" and even my parents keep telling me to "make it real".
but it's really strange. because I try to be consistent. I always remind him that he's my good "friend" and no more. even though I have to say, sometimes I get carried away and treat him like real boyfriend too.
Lately though, he's been doing things that are really romantic, like singing, reciting verses, playing guitar for me,,, and he's been missing me, calling me, telling me that i "got special privilege for being a wonderful girlfriend"
And I feel scared. I mean, I don't want to forget that it's just fake. And I don't know what and how to respond to him sometimes because I don't want to ruin our friendship. I don't know what to do... and I'm not even sure what is going on...because apparently I do enjoy my special privilege...
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
life is about taking risks.
“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”
i hope that quote helps you realize what to do..
take a risk and go for it. tell him how you feel. just talk to him about it. tell him everything on your mind. then listen to what he has to say. dont interrupt him. nobody on this website can tell you what to do. the power is in your hands. not ours. you decide what to do. all we can do is give you guidance. my guidance for you is to listen to your hear, take a chance, and if it doesnt work out.. then thats fate. everything happens for a reason. if it doesnt work out between you 2, it wasnt meant to be. if it does work out, then it was meant to be.
good luck :)
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insensitive and future pastor don't really sound like they should go together, but let's get to the point.
whats to feel scared about? if you want to stick to the original battle plan, then stick with it. stay firm and remind him of y'all's little drug deal. keeping up the public facade should be maintained, but if he tries to do the same things when you're alone with him, draw the line. however comma- look at it from a different angle, what is a romantic relationship? it is, boiled down to its essence, a friendship that is extrememly close and has a physically intimate side. I don't favor blind dates because of this, I tend to keep friendships for years and develop the situation, let my perspective mate get to know me as a friend, establish a baseline rapport. and that may just be your beau's battle plan from the beginning. perhaps he saw you as out of his league, and due to the numerous relationship issues, saw an opening to get to know you, and you him.
from a military perspective, everything is METT-TC dependent.
what was your mission?- clearly to get guys off your back
who was your "enemy"?- prospective mates
your time table?- a year, maybe two of single life I'm guessing
the terrain(a loose term that includes the people around you)- your family, friends, the unknowing public
and as far as troop considerations, I'm sure you're not concerned about food, water and ammo.
His answers to the same questions may be very different. specifically his mission.
good luck, stay sharp, we men are crafty too.
-Gunner
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