|
omg thank you so much . the reason am asking you is because i broke up with my boyfriend. its been 7 months already , and i dont think about him so often , now i listen to music more and i have more fun but i really dont know whats wrong with me, and am only 17 yrs old ;) . we dated for 2 yrs and 3 months.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Thats a LONG time to be with someone at 17! No wonder you are heartbroken.
I have 16-year-olds ask me why they are so heart broken when they end a relationship after 2 months...
I know the cliche is annoying "time heals all wounds" but it really is true. At 17 it is hard to put yourself in another's shoes and therefore put your own problem into perspective. There are two things I think about with your story:
1. is My grandpa became a widower 4 years ago. They were married for 59 1/2 years but dated for 5 years before they married and knew each other for years before they started dating. They were high school sweethearts together from beginning to end for approximately 70 years. HE deserves to be heartbroken. 70 years... that takes a LONG time to heal. He still gets teary-eyed and it has been ... actually over 5 years! I cant believe it. The perspective is that 5 years after 70 years of togetherness... that is nothing. He has the right to still be sad. You are 17 and spent almost 2 1/2 years with him. You have the right to be sad. You need to still live your life and certainly should not rush into another relationship... but you were with him for a long time- considering your age.
2. Consider 2 people in a hospital room. One in a full body cast, the other with a sprained ankle. The guy in the full body cast is certainly in pain. This doesn't make the guy with the sprained ankle hurt any less just because the other guy is worse off!
What I mean by this is just because you were ONLY together for a little more than 2 years doesn't mean you should be fine by now. You loved him and spent a lot of time thinking about him, being with him, sharing life with him. Take your time healing.
Have fun just being YOU for a while. You dont need- at 17- devoting another several years with a guy only to have to deal with this again. Date. Go out with boys and enjoy fun and friendships but the serious stuff... hold off for a while. Then in a couple of years you will be more ready to find a man who is ready for a long term relationship like you and you can dive into those waters again. But don't sit and fret over WHY you are still emotional over your ex. I am in my 30's. I have been happily- and I mean happily married for almost 13 years. I had a ... boyfriend?? my junior year in high school. We just dated for- maybe 4 months. I was not sexually active in high school. We literally just dated; dinners, amusement parks, after school functions, etc. He and I are both married now (not to each other) and have children. He doesnt even live in this country anymore!!! We are Facebook friends. Once in a while I see a picture of us together in high school and get this little twinge of emotion. And I havent seen him face to face in... 15 years!!!
Humans are not made of stone. When you are ready to move on your heart will tell you. Until then, take the time YOU need to allow yourself to emotionally heal. All too often our friends get sick of hearing about and fuss at us to "move ON already!" Ignore them. Maybe they heal faster. You are you. Dont compare yourself to others. Be yourself. If you love yourself you can better love another. And I think that is enough ramble for one post LOL.
Good luck.
]
More Questions: |