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regarding your comment about your fiance leaving earth
You said when your fiance killed himself it was hard on those he left behind. granted. You said his problems are only temporary. Tell that to the homeless person living in a box who used to have a job and home. It isn't always temporary! Sometimes it just gets worse and worse. It may be hard on those left behind but you can't imagine how hard it is on those of us who are miserable here. It may be selfish to want to end the constant pain, torment and struggle but don't you think it's selfish to want someone to endure that?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Activism?
Hi there,
The person you meant to send this to doesn't allow inbox questions from anonymous users, so the question came to me by default.
If you write me directly and let me know who you were wanting to see this, I will bring it to their attention.
In the mean time, may I share something of my own?
The homeless person living in a box... no job, no home... Well, if that is the worst that will happen to them, then they have a great deal to be grateful for. Why?
I have personally worked with the homeless, and a surprising number find their way back from the street. All it takes, usually, is time, and someone to help with the first steps.
I don't know what form of misery you speak from when you say: "...those of us who are miserable here."
... but, I hope you know that there are people who really do want to help. For me, here is what I can offer from experience:
Darkness is a funny thing. It seems to be able to convince us that when we see light we are just imagining it. That things can't get better because all we can see is darkness.
I found, during the darkest period of my life, that service to others takes that power away from the darkness.
Spend a day feeding the homeless and you will find that the life you just described as worthy of suicide is one that many people enjoy as best they are able.
The most inspiring things I have seen come from people you may have already written off. Example:
There is a homeless shelter in San Diego. One homeless man volunteered to feed others in his situation, feeling that he might not have money but he had good hands and a work ethic so maybe he could help.
This didn't go unnoticed and since then he has had several jobs, a home and currently runs the shelter that used to keep him alive.
Sometimes we can't control what happens to us, but the thing that helped me more than I can say is understanding that we CAN choose how to react to the things that happen to us.
My wife walked out of my life 3 days before our 10th anniversary. She said she was going to a doctor's appointment with her mother and she would be right back. She told me she loved me, smiled on the way out the door... And I have, to this day, years later, never seen her again.
The reasons behind everything turned out to be things I wasn't aware of. It took six months to find out the truth, and in those six months the darkness had a pretty firm hold on me at first.
I could very easily have ended my own life.
Turns out that the best thing in the world was my now ex-wife leaving. Changed my world entirely, and the period of darkness is simply a tool to get a person to wake up to what their future holds.
I urge you to talk with someone about all of this. The truth of the matter is that VERY rarely is any darkness permanent... but if we don't know how to face it, it can look like an eternal thing. It isn't.
I have seen people come through incredibly painful cancers. Sometimes when the doctors have given up, the darkness clears and there is remission.
If people can live through that, I will not dishonor their courage by letting the trifles that trouble me keep me down.
I hope this makes sense the way it is written here, and if you have questions I hope you will write me directly in the future.
Perhaps if you tell me what you are facing I will know a way to help. Stranger things have happened.
Russell...
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