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Won't stay hard
So my boyfriend is 19 years old. For some reason, whenever we try to have sex. He does get hard, but once he puts on the condom... He gets soft again. I asked him if it's because the condom is uncomfortable, and he said it's kind of tight on him. Of course condoms are supposed to be tight. So I constantly have to get him hard again and try to stick it in... But then it got soft inside me. I asked him if he was nervous, he said he's not nervous and he does not know what's going on. So whenever we take off the condom (don't worry, we didn't do it without a condom) he gets hard again. So my guess it's the condom? But I'm not sure. But yesterday, I actually got him inside of me before he got soft again, but.... I couldn't pleasure him as much as I wanted to... (He's shorter than average). I had to be on top just so it can stay in, and once it comes out... It gets soft. So, I have two questions:
What is going on? Is it the condom? And how exactly can I pleasure him when we actually do have sex with a condom? He's the first guy who I heard of that has trouble having sex.... >_<"
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Well, his complaint of "it's kind of tight on him" (quoted you) might be true.
There are multiple sizes for condoms; it's not really a one-size-fits-all kind of things.
I suggest you two try some different sizes to find out. Here are some useful sources:
GoAskAlice, Columbia University of New York City: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
GoAskAlice, Columbia University of New York City: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
News Room of Indiana University: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
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Does he have any kind of illness or treatment with new medication? That can be a cause for sexual side-effects and inability to maintain an erection.
It sounds like this problem isn't his fault or yours and could be medical in nature. He might not be used to using condoms either and may want to try another brand.
The quickest solution is to get a product at an adult novelty store (it has a vulgar name we can't print) that is a plastic ring that slides to the base of the penis and traps blood thus eliminating your problem.
I would have him see an urologist who can make sure that there is nothing the matter with his sexual organs that causes this as it may be medical and may be psychological and having to do with fear of some kind.
I wouldn't have unprotected sex or recommend it unless you knew neither of you had any STDs and were on birth control. If he can maintain and achieve an erection that way and not with a condom it's baffling.
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