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bad boy a go?
I like an 18 yr. old junior at my high school. I'm a 15 yr. old freshman. He smokes cigarettes and pot, and drinks. I do none of these. He is nothing like most druggies. He is caring, friendly, smart and motivated. He has plans of college and later life. I promised myself I would never get involved with a guy that does drugs but I have an attraction to him. Should I keep trying to get him or just stop because of how different we are even though we are friends? Thanks.
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My boyfriend fits into your description (except for cigarettes). And I drank maybe 3 times a year. If you have the strength to be your own person and not let his habits influence you to do the same then the relationship is fine. In fact, my non-illegal lifestyle influenced my boyfriend and he quit smoking and hardly drinks. And I never told him to, he just decided to do it for himself. "Bad boys" are not a lost cause. If they're good to you and his lifestyle doesn't affect you.
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It is good that you are both friends. Use the time and friendship to get to know him better. Watch to see whether or not he is going to let drugs and alcohol cause problems in his life. Many of us have tried drugs and alcohol, the attraction to some thing that is forbidden is so strong. Which is probably why you are attracted to him. If he is as nice as you say he is. He may realize that drugs and alcohol will close more doors than they will open. Smoking too! I mean it is sooo expensive. Most smokers started at a young age. Nicotine in cigaretts is one of the MOST addictive drugs on earth. When you are an adult with a 3 pack a day habit at $7.00 a pack. That is 21 dollars a day, that is $7,665 a year. A three pack a day habit is not unusual among adult smokers.
So, if you see him getting in trouble due to being high on drugs on drunk on alcohol or just not caring what happens when he is under their influence, then I think you should stick with your original plan and not date anyone who drinks or does drugs. Your original plan was sound and made good sense then and makes good sense now. You are going to be attracted to a lot of guys who may not be a good influence on you. Stay true to your plans and your convictions and you won't go wrong. Yes some day you will meet and be attracted to a guy who has the same values as you do. It rarely happens at your age. Guys just don't think like girls at this age. They do mature later. Now they want to play have fun and experiment. Push the envelope, so to speak. It is normal. But they can leave a long trail of broken hearts behind them, before they mature and really start to think about what they want, and what they are willing to change and/or work at to achieve it.
Good luck to you dear
Michele
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