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Last Tuesday my boyfriend of a year and 2 months broke up with me. But, the day after he spoke to me and said how depressed he has been all day and he only wants a break for a while. I agreed with this - but this has got to be the most hardest thing I've ever gone through, he doesn't even know if we will get back together or not. One of the reasons why he did this is because I never show how happy he makes me an I'm just always sad when I'm around him. I've just been thinking all this time and I know I can do all the things he's told me htat I don't do. But just today I've been thinking about how to show he makes me happy and I realised it isn't something that I can do.
I used to be a big attention seeker, but being with him made me just grow up and be mature. I don't quite know how to explain it, but I.. show the opposite emotions? Like not just around him it's around everyone. I just don't like attention on me any more. So when I'm happy I just don't show it because people will be all like 'oh what's put you in a good mood' then if I'm upset it'd just be the exact same. I really don't know how to explain it properly though. I think I'm going to speak to him tonight about this as we have agreed to still speak and be as close as we were as friends - but I don't know if attempting to explain this will make a difference or he thinks I'm just making it up to get him back. I mean, obviously I do want him back and he knows I do, but he has told me he needs time and I completely respect that. I just don't know if I should bring this up or I'll just sound pathetic?
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this sounds all too familiar to me. i'm the exact same way, and no, you can't explain it. my boyfriend took a break from me for almost the same reason, i'm guessing.
what you need to do sometimes, even if you're not in the best mood, you need to let him know that he's doing his job of making you a happy person--on the inside. like maybe smile more often, laugh sometimes, or just tell him in some body language; give him a hug or a peck on the cheek. hold his hand, kiss his neck, etc. any of these things will let a guy know that you're happy, even when you're really not. but it does let them know that you're happy, mentally, with them.
try some of these things. he'll start feeling the love eventually.
and as an afterthought, try to talk to your doctor about anti-depressants or something. i found out i was this way because i'm depressed. it might be the same with you.
i hope i helped :)
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