|
I want the relationship to work... he kinda doesnt or do OMG HELP!
Hi i have been with my boyfriend for 7 years. We have a beautiful 1 year old son, have a home, and i love him to peices. We had an big argument and now becuase of over the course of our long relationship he feels liek the same things keep coming up and now he feels liek he cant put up with it anymore. he says it over. he loves me but he cant do it anymore. so im going to have to move out but im trying to figure out how to save this!?! i really really really want this relationship to work. i love him and want us to move forward and do all the great things we have set for our family. what can i do to try to get him to see that i am willing tomake the changes so that we can be great?!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I can understand your plight, I may be wrong, but my understanding of your message is this, you keep nagging your boyfriend about the same issues over and over again. Maybe it is because you want him to do something that he is not doing or because you want him to change the way he does things, but whatever the case may be, the same issues keep coming up because you are annoyed about it. Am I correct? Women will usually complain when something is bothering them. Most men do not like to be nagged and it will take you a long time to understand that you cannot change a person, but eventually you will. That person must be willing to change within themselves. If he doesn't want to change, you will find that you will be arguing for the rest of your life. I think that if you told him a few times already what it is that you don't like, its now time to leave him alone and let him make the transition on his own. Don't nag him. I guarantee you, if you continue to nag, you will loose him. And for God's sake, if you say that you forgive him, don't bring up that same issue when another arguement comes around. Forgive and let that situation die. I do think that counselling will be a great idea and give him a little space and tim eto blow off his anger, he will come around.
]
Hi there,
It sounds like you two have been butting heads over these issues for a very long time. The one thing to learn from that is that it is pretty obvious that the two of you aren't equipped to fix it by yourselves, right?
How about getting some help? A marriage counselor would be a good place to start. I know, you may not be married, but 7 years is far too long to think you don't have the problems married people have. In many states you would be considered his common-law wife after this long.
Now, in all honesty, what have you done before this to fix the problems that he is at the point of leaving over? If you know what needs to change and you haven't changed it, it is time to ask yourself why.
Another thing to consider is this: Relationship problems are very, very rarely one-sided. Because of this, it can be really hard for the two people involved to resolve things without the help and guidance of someone who isn't involved in the relationship. Someone who can see it clearly without all the hurt feelings and resentment getting in the way.
A relationship coach really is where I would go from here if it were me. Whatever you do... do NOT get your friends involved in this. Trust me.
Take care, and I hope, for the sake of your child as well as yourselves, that you will do what it takes to give the baby a safe and happy home.
]
More Questions: |