Question Posted Wednesday December 23 2009, 2:39 am
17/F
so christianity is a HUGE thing in my life.... and if i ever start to like a guy, one thing i look for is if he is a christian... so theres this boy at my church who is 18, and he has a great relationship with the Lord, he is just outstanding! i started to fall for him this summer. before the summer, he was awkward to talk to, but very nice to look at! haha. we started chilling in groups over the summer... and last week we went to a parrty together. i rode with him and we stopped at his house to pick up his guitar and before entering he said, "my parents aren't home would that be okay with your 'rents? i don't want to disrespect them" and i was just sooo happy he said that because that means he respects elders... anyways, so i now get butterflies everytime i see this boy, i look at his facebook page every 2 seconds etc. but he "DOESNT DATE" and everyone knows it.
WHAT DO I DO??? i don't want to make it awkward and tell him how i feel and KNOW i'm going to get rejected.
but im falling for him....
adviceman49 answered Wednesday December 23 2009, 10:12 am: I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
This is something I have never tackled before so I will just pass along some thoughts that have come to mind.
You wrote that you met this young man at church and have been with him in group functions. Where I live many of the Churches have outings for young adults. Most are day or evening trips but some are chaperoned multi-day trips to interesting places such as New York City where they visit Churches, Museums and even take in a Theater show.
While what I am about to suggest may sound a little forward, it is acceptable to day for a young lady to ask a young man to escort her. My suggestion is to find some outing your church sponsors and ask this young man if he might be willing to escort you on one of them. I would make the first one a day outing. I would also ask if he would like to meet your parents before going on this outing as he sounds like the kind of young man who desires to have the proper respect for all before he does anything.
Having him escort you is different that a date as each of you would pay your own way. You can offer to pay his way if he says he cannot afford such an outing. Once you two have been on several of these outing you should find out more about him and why he does not dateand decide how you want to proceed with this relationship. [ adviceman49's advice column | Ask adviceman49 A Question ]
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