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This is really stressing me out.
I'm kind of surprised at myself, asking a question on here about my love life. Usually I can deal things out on my own- but lately I've realized my antics only lead to the same outcome :unhappy and alone. Here's the lowdown-
My friend,we'll call her X, used to really like this kid- Z. So it was fine, I was happy for them if anything were to come out of it.So they were on webcam, and i went on just to say hi. Then "Z", ends up telling my friend X, that he has a huge crush on me. Thing is, i found it kind of odd,seeing as usually to like someone you have to talk to them first.(that's how i am,anyway) So naturally my friend X, was crushed. I felt horrible, because i only wanted the best for them two. X finally moves on from Z, and she gets a boyfriend-who she claims to be "in love" with. (mind you they've been dating for a matter of two weeks- ALSO, a side question before i get to my major one- WHY do people do that? Say they love someone so fast? I think its ridiculous, am i missing something?) Anyway, X is moved on. And lately "Z" and i have been talking. He's 18 and i'm 16. We're okay talking,but i can still tell that X likes him, no matter how much she "loves" her new boyfriend. The thing is- somethings telling me to not go for Z. But; this ALWAYS happens to me when i start to develop feelings for people! I really want a relationship- but every time i get close to some one, i get scared of what they'll think of me and I'll try to fade away. I feel like I'm jinxing myself in from every angle here just writing this, but can someone help me out? How can i never get close to someone? Why do i fear feelings? I've never had a male figure to really rely on, but my inability to let someone in is starting to feel like a disability. I know i'm all over the place with this but i'd really like to get my love life in order :P. Any help on any of the topics i've talked about would really help! thank you.
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Divine...
you have a lot going on for your self
to answer your question first yes it is possible
to fall in love in first sight. everyone have one of those momments trust me you will know.
but your friend X isn't really in love she don't really love him period I just think she trying to
feel the void of feeling like she bben played and the fact that it a possiblity you and Z may just hook up
and the tell you the truth I think that it wrong to hook up with your friend ex-bf inless they been talking for like a week then it understanblae but in your case it not your fault
I think that it was good that Z came out and told both of you what he was feeling now it just your turn to meet him the rest of the way
and I understand that it may be hard to open up
but you don't have to not right away to him but on a serious note you need to learn how to open up
go back into your past in think what got you so closed in once you do that learn how to deal with it and get over it this is important why casue this can have an effect on your life if you continue to let it go on... I know this out of experience MYSELF what your doing right now is living in FEAR I know this cause I just got done dealing with it
1. your afraid of being hurt by someone
and your afradi of hurting someone
2. your afraid of being left alone
and have to leave someone alone
3.your afraid of lying to someone
and your afraid of being lied to
there is so much that I know your afraid of and it come to one word your afraid to trust in whoever cause you continue to wonder what and your not able to see in the future to know what going to happen so the only way that your saving your self is by keeping a distance...I know this like I said I'm a witness and I had to learn this on my own....so I hope this help
sorry for the long advice but I know that this will help you alot....
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To start with, your friend, X probably says she is "in love" because she is caught up in the moment. Hormones and whatnot are pumping through her blood like a fire hydrant, it can make your emotions go wack.
Z, is fair game, yes X is your friend, and you have your loyalties, but you have to follow your heart. X, if she is a really good friend will support you, and understand. I would talk to her about how you feel though, point out that if she was you, she might be tempted to do the same thing. Just for good measure you may want to give X and her new boyfriend another week, before you move forward.
You may be second guessing yourself, and potential suitors because you are scared. Maybe you have seen failed relationships in your family, divorces maybe. You have to remember that you deserve everything good the world has to give you. Be confident. I hope everything works out.
Best Wishes!
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