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A friend likes me and keeps crossing boundaries, how do I end friendship?
27/Female. Friend is 36yr/Male
Recently an old friend of mine made contact with me after 3 years of not speaking, and we have casually began talking the last couple of months.I have received care packages and even flowers from him in the last month. He expressed that these gifts were for congrats on my move to Chicago and flowers being a get well because I was recently injured. He also confessed his band just recorded 8 songs that were written about me. Last week my roomate posted some pictures of me on Facebook and the next day I received a late night drunken email from him telling me how beautiful I was and how he couldn't wait to see me again. I never responded to his email and a week later he wrote me another email saying I was being distant (since I hadn't responded) and how unfair it is that I am "drawing lines in the sand." A little background: We were friends for 2 years and one night he got really drunk and professed his love for me. This came as a complete surprise because I never so much as hugged him before. Next day I told him how I did not share his feelings and that we could only be friends. A month later we were at a wedding and he was drunk and got really mad at me because I was talking to a guy and he shouted in front of other guests "you are my date! you are suppose to be my date tonight!" The next day I called him and told him that I needed space and that he could no longer call me. 6 months later I left the country and received an apology email from him during my travels. 3 years later, I thought enough time had passed that maybe we could be friends again. I don't want to be friends because he obviously still has feelings for me that will never go away and I find his recent actions to be inappropriate. Although he has taken the passive approach of emailing me, I feel like I should call him and be direct, erase him from my Facebook and never speak to him again. Problem is, I don't know what to say. I don't want our phone conversation to go round and round in circles. How do I break this off for good?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
My dear first off I think you are on the right track, but before I tell you how to break this off I want you to think about this, have you ever had feelings for this guy ? And over the last three years has he changed. And sometimes when your are in love with someone sometimes they express it in different ways, and when there is alcohol involved, people instead to speak there mind more. So are you not wanting to try being friends after three years because you are afraid of what he has done in the past or because he had feeling for you at one time? These are just a few thinks to think about before you
decide to make that move. And if you do decide to delete him from your life. Be honest with him tell him how you feel and this is why you want to cut the friendship off DON'T let him control the conversation you take control from start to finish. When done with that delete him from face book and were ever you have him saved as a contact. Send me a message to tell me how everthing works..
Thanks
Tim
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