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his priorities are all messed up.
My boyfriend and I just had a baby in July (I'm 18, he's 24). Ever since we've been together he's always seemed like he was more interested in going out and having a good time at bars and stuff rather than being with me. But if you really love someone don't you want to spend as much time with them as possible? I thought maybey when I had the baby he would stop going out all together, but that hasn't changed. I just feel like I'm at the bottom of his priorities. Every Thursday he goes over to the bar across from my house for a concert they have there, and yesterday(thursday) I told him I didnt want him to go..but he didn't care. He said he'd only be an hour but ended up there for 2 1/2..I confronted him when he got home and just said "if youre going to say an hour, then I expect you home in an hour"..and he started getting all pissy and ended up sleeping on the floor. But I was completely calm and nice about it so he had no reason to over react that way.
Today he acted like nothing was wrong.
I'm just sick of wondering if he really loves me. He says he does all the time - but actions speak louder than words. He wants to get married in January and then have me and the baby move with him where he's stationed (because hes going to the marines).. and I'm afraid to marry someone who's not 100 percent set on making me happy. Isn't that what marriage is about? Advice?!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
if you're not sure, you should just go talk him about it. and if you're really not sure about marrying him, then don't. because basically marrying that person is making a commitment to him.
but, it's just like my sister's best friend was going through, they had a baby.. and all he does is go out and doesn't come back til late at night, they argue all the time.
they're still together but then they just don't live together anymore... but he does take care of that baby and stuff. you should really talk to him about it.
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Well, I most certainly don't blame your worries, however, you need to change your priorities as well.
It's selfish to expect someone to be 100% set on making YOU happy. That is not what marriage is about. You should BOTH be 100% set on making your CHILD happy.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but your lives are no longer about you. They are about the innocent kid you brought into the mix.
The innocent kid who's father would rather hang out with his buddies at the bar than spend time with him/her.
The innocent kid who's mother is more concerned with the father not spending time with her.
So there IS something wrong here, and it's wrong with both of you.
31/f
Married mother of 2 baby boys.
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