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Decision
I've been with my boyfriend for about seven months but we were close friends before that. Our relationship has never been plain sailing and we have had countless problems and arguments, even briefly splitting up once or twice. Recently it's just got to the point where we're barely together. We rarely see each other, when we speak on the phone we just argue. Neither of us know what we want, we've said 'I love you' to each other but I don't feel like that anymore.
I keep thinking about my ex and how happy I was with him, we split up over a year ago but I know I'm just thinking like that because I'm not happy with my current boyfriend.
I know it sounds obvious that we should just split up, but everytime I try and do it something stops me. I've been diagnosed with Depression and I'm scared of being alone, as my boyfriend is my rock. As I said, we were very good friends before and confided in each other alot. I know it would be selfish to expect him to stay friends with me if I were to break up with him. I know he cares about and loves me and I don't want to hurt him.
I don't know what to do. I feel so selfish for not making a decision but I just can't bring myself to do it. We've tried going on breaks and things still aren't working. What should I do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
There is always something left to say, it's up to you to find it.
Sigh.
Find something to say or end it. You're at the point where you both need to decide. Not figure it out, decide. Do you want to make this work?
If so, sit down and start a new conversation. "We want to be together, how do we stop jumping all over each other?"
Lastly, a tip and truth of relationships. Confession, apology, and forgiveness are the tools friends use to break down barriers. Same goes for those dating each other.
If you want to make this work, go up to him and lay it out on the table. "I love you, I'm sick of fighting with you, I want to be with you, can we just sit down with each other and promise not to let ourselves yell?"
The only thing you have to do is not stop talking. If you have nothing else to say, the relationship is over. But as stated, there's always something else to say. Having no words is a choice in and of itself, because they will always be there if you look for them.
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