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What am I doing wrong!!!
16/m
Hi well my problem is that I can't ever keep a relationship going every time we breek up within the few weeks or days I can't ever be happy, the other week I asked a girl out I thought we were doing well I was doing everything living it up enjoying my time with her, berly a week and she broke up with me... Why would this happen to me everytime especially this time I really like her I did everything differnt yet I failed, I was once told that I'm the type of guy who usually in those chick flicks gets the girl in the end I never believed it but now I think I'm beginning to understand it, it meant for me to last with a girl I would have had to been through a breakup with her meaning that this would be our second time going out, sounds dumb but I'm willing to try it, the one thing that scares me is that if she don't like me I'm going to end up waiting for years just for nothing,
When I asked why? she told me it was because she was confused and did not know if she liked me the same way as I like her, I gave her a letter and a drawing and a hug and a kiss before I walked away
I don't know what to do
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Ok.
First off, it's a really bad sign that you compared yourself to romantic comedies. Do I really have to point out that movies are not real life?
In real life, the guy who gets the girl is the guy who knows what the girl he's chasing wants.
You don't learn this in a day, or even necessarily in a single relationship. But if you pay attention, and start trying to figure out what real girls want in a guy, you'll find a lot more success than you do now.
To give you some specific points.
If you think you have to break up and get back together in order to be together, you're an idiot. If you see that as some kind of goal, you're going to act in a way that brings about it, and obviously it's working so well that you aren't even lasting a week.
At a guess, you come on way too strong. A letter, a drawing, a hug, and a kiss?
Let me give you an insight. Pretty much all women want excitement in their relationships. That excitement starts with the mutual dance around the issue of liking each other. Flirting without openly admitting you like each other. A girl wants her guy to have a little mystery.
The reason for all this BS, is that guys are usually more direct about deciding they like a girl than a girl is. Guys are logical. You see a girl who matches what you want, and you like her. Girls are emotional. They feel it out, they test the waters to see if they get those butterflies. They rely a lot more on impression and their emotional reactions to you.
So what you have to do is give her time to realize she likes you. Complimenting girls, noticing things about them, smiling in reaction.
What you did, the exact thing you did, is you put out the fact that you like her before she was sure she liked you. That puts pressure on her to feel the same, because now that it's established that you really like her. She knows that if SHE loved YOU and you didn't feel the same way she'd be devastated. She has to decide if she feels as strongly about it as she thinks you do. If she doesn't, she's going to run away.
Don't throw your like in people's faces so quickly. Give them time to wonder.
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