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Just a thought..
When most think of virginity, it's supposedly this sacred thing that one "loses" and should be handled accordingly. If society didn't make a whole deal about being a virgin, or losing your virginity how different do you think things would be? Do you think people would being losing it more casually, or do you think more people would feel a sense of not having to have sex at a young age because there isn't such an emphasis on virginity? I live in America, and I have to say, as a teenager, the concept of virginity is talked about frequently. Thoughts?
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Its the only way to stop people psychologically.
Teens are too stupid in general to place credence in ideas like "sex is supposed to mean something" or "you're too young and emotionally immature to handle the full impacts of the decisions you're making"
So what do you do? You find something that invokes an instinctive emotional reaction.
Purity. Virginity being equal to purity and being a special gift and all that is designed to get women to wait. Yes, its focused entirely on women. Because men just don't care. Men are designed to pursue sex, and young men who have the opportunity for sex are going to take it 90% of the time. Most guys sub 20s are not mature enough to say no to sex from a girl they like if they have the opportunity, even when its a terrible idea (Hence, drunken hook ups and the like)
So the entire thing is about closing down the opportunities girls offer them. You associate some level of shame with lack of purity and pride with being pure, to give people a reason to not.
Look at society today. When was the last time you got a message from anywhere except maybe your parents that sex is a part of the development of a loving, close, committed relationship?
Movies and TV don't do it. You can't keep someone's interest with a slowly developing deep love story the way you can with drama and chaos and love stories that blossom over the course of a movie with a time of under 2 hours.
School just avoids the subject altogether, pretending that teens don't do anything the way it has been since time immemorial.
So, no one is telling kids what dating has been. Our parents have fallen WOEFULLY down on the job. How our culture got so screwed up about sex that no one has any idea of whats supposed to take place before hand, and so teens just make it up as they go, I have no idea.
But thats the basic problem. Lack of guidance. In our discomfort we resorted to motivations used by the earliest settlers of this country.
Guilt.
Thats what virginity is. Because no one wants to explain to their kids about relationships. Because too many adults don't have a clue in that area themselves. They use virginity as the hammer they slam down on the table to make loud noises and try to scare you.
Because, for some reason, no one has the common sense to tell kids "You shouldn't be having sex at 13, you should be nervously asking each other out"
Sugaslap below is a perfect example. The wealth of information available through TV and the internet and friends makes teens think something they never thought before. That they know everything. That they know enough to handle things.
But even a 17 year old, is still a minor for a reason. I would say to any 17 year old who thinks that they are ready to take care of themselves, we don't in this day and age teach you enough to know that by 17. And alot fewer of you are mature enough to handle your own shit all on your own than think so.
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