|
jealous,and scared
well I have a bf.he askd me out on xmas eve. I liked him sooo much. nd even before he askd me out and I still do.well he has A LOT of friends that are girls. and I get super jealous when he talks to them or something. I talked to him sorta about it over texting.and he says he understands the "I don't want to be hurt" but he said not to worry cause he isn't going to break up with me and for me not to be jealous.well my question is how can I get over my jealousy? cause it always leads to us arguing I don't want us to break up. please don't say "just don't think about it.just trust him" cuz we do trust eachother we went over that.and I trust him just not the other girls.and if you gona say "talk to him" I have a couple times. so if your gona say that then at least give me some pointers on what to say! please and thankyou in advance!!!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
okay. well :) i have kind of the same problem. or at least i use to. i have been dating my boyfriend for abour 6 months now and in the beginning this sort of thing bothered me more. we go to different schools so it makes it harder but it definitely forces the issue. i know me-ill be talking up a storm with my guyfriends. and i know him-and why should he not talk it up with his own friends? does this boy of yours ever tell you that he gets jealous when you talk to guys? if not, he probably still does but he is trying not to let it get the best of him. trust me, jealousy is not going to help anything. and sure, a little bit makes the other feel of a bit of importance, but it truly gets out of proportion if it is ongoing.
the other thing in my situation is that i dont party, he does. so there i have to trust the other girls. and i have to trust the alcohol. now i will never trust the alcohol but i have to trust that he wont put himself in a position that will make him or i regret anything. its still hard and i had an ex who got drunk and went with another girl which, to say the least, wasn't fun to deal with.
you just have to know his morals and that he wont do anything to you. deep down youre probably always going to feel that spout of jealousy towards the other girls. it happens. but if they're just talking and your man isnt like "alone" alone with any of them, you really dont have anything to worry about. if you truly think he wont do anything to hurt you, then there you go, he wont do anything to hurt you. you know him better than me. he should respect your wishes of not overspending time with them but he shouldn't cut them out of his life either. just try to laugh it off and kind of joke about it with him. like when you're on the phone and about to hang up be like "so im tired, ill let you go." and he'll be like alright and then you say, "but hey itll give you a little bit of time to call your other girlfriends right?" and then laugh so he knows its jokingly. itll ease things up a bit.
goodluck!
]
Think of it as a compliment. The girls are obviously talking to him because they think he's a good guy, and they know he's your guy. Every time you see him talking to another girl know that they are the ones who should be jealous of you. He wants you to be his girlfriend, not them.
]
i think if you really trusted him you wouldnt be worried about him talking to the other girls.
if you dont trust the other girls thats fine, but they have nothing to do with it. they cant force him to cheat.
my advice is that think about when you talk to other guys. and think about how it might come off as flirting to other people but you know in reality theres nothing there. (now im not sure how you talk to other guys but im just trying to get you to see a point). like you might text someone alot but it doesnt mean you like him or that he likes you. or you might talk to someone in class daily it doesnt mean you like him you just like talking to him, just as a friend. you know what i mean?
if you trust him. and you can honestly believe everything that comes out of his mouth, and he says they are just friends. then thats what they are.
if you feel like you dont talk to other guys like he talk to his 'girl' friend and you dont want him to talk to other girls period, then you should flat out tell him that. in my opinion that would make things worse though, because your making him choose between friends and girl friend.
and one last thing. if he wanted to be with those other girls then he wouldnt be with you. maybe thats a way you could think about it, for you to be less suspicious about him.
i really hope i helped,
and i hope things get better for you.
]
More Questions: |