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Chasing a boy (long, but I would appreciate your help!)
There's a boy (A) who I was in a serious relationship with until we broke up in February, and I was devestated, but we were still close friends, although we started drifting apart since we go to different schools. I tried to get over it, and over the summer I casually dated another guy (B) who I definitely was not into as much as A. So when A and I were catching up one day, he asked if I was seeing anyone, just because he was curious, and I explained that I was dating B but I wasn't sure where it would go. So then he told me he wanted another chance at us being together, and so a few weeks later I decided I was wasting my time with B and took up A's offer. It ended up he broke up with me after only a week because he said it felt like we were friends with benefits... which I can understand, and I think it's because we started right where we left off and we didn't give ourselves time to reconnect. Now, 4 months later, I saw him for the first time since we were dating last. And I felt like we both connected really strongly, and we were getting along, and we were both really happy being together again and I realized how much I couldn't let him go because he is the only one I feel matches with me. The problem is, I've been in a relationship with another guy (C) for 2 weeks now who is really sweet and good-looking and funny, but I feel awkward with him sometimes. I talked to A about how I was feeling because I needed to speak my mind to someone and he was the best one I knew, and then I told him he was a good friend, and I never realized how much I appreciated that until we drifted apart. He told me the same. But he is thinking about asking another girl out, so I don't know if I should pursue him. I just feel like I'm missing out by dating C, and I wish I could have another chance with A. I think it would be a great relationship, if we could learn from our mistake last time, and it makes me excited to think what we could have. But I don't know how to tell him this, and I don't want to make it awkward between us if he doesn't feel the same way because I'd rather be his friend than nothing at all. I'm so confused! Help?
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It's cute how you two end up back with each other, as if something is telling you to still be with him. Maybe its meant to be that way. I think you too should start over from the fresh, without the whole "friends with benefits" idea. The fact that you've already had a strong relationship with him is very good for your communication skills so you shouldn't hesitate to talk to him about it. The worst you he can say is no but at least letting him know how you feel would make somewhat of a relief to you. Tell C that you really see him as a friend and nothing more, but make sure you tell him that he holds a special place in your heart that no one can replace. Talk to A once again and make it a fresh start, I think that's what got you too to break up. If A still wants to ask out the other girl, there's honestly nothing you can do. If you truly love him, you'd want to see him happy. Hopefully, he realizes that he's missing you and will tell you that the feeling is mutal. Hope that helps!
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honestly, this really depends on how much you like him. if you really like him THAT much and think that this time it will definately work out, then you should atleast talk to him. start by asking if he still has feelings for you. say you're just curious. if he doesn't then move on, if he does, then keep talking to him and see if he wants another go at it. either that, or end it completely. try harder to be comfortabel with this new guy. get used to him. get to know him better. he does sound like he is sort of toying with your feelings, but you never know. it's best to get everything straight before you start making rash decisions.
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This is just my personal opinion and at the end of the day, you know these boys better than random people on the internet.
BUT
I go by the saying "you are ex's for a reason" if it doesn't work out the first time (or 2nd for you), then the chance of it working another time is slim. Yeah, you know what not to do, but why didn't you put those things into practice when you WERE together?
You are with a new guy now, who is "sweet, good looking and funny", so why ruin a good thing?
I'm being brutally honest and it just sounds like A is toying with your feelings because he knows he can - and he knows you still have a soft spot for him.
You guys had your chance and it just didn't work.
Also, he's thinking of asking another girl out. That should make massive DING DING DING noises inside your head to tell you something's just not right....
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