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I was looking at your column and I was wondering where you got your information when answering the question about the 16 year old who thought she might be pregnant.
Mainly this statement: Condoms DO NOT protect from STDs--which can be carried by VIRGINS.
If a std is a infection/diseases that is transmitted by sex how it is that a virgin when the definition is 'a person who has never had sexual intercourse' carry one?
And how does a condom not protect against an std, I do know that they are not 100% effective.
I really would like to know where you got this information being that it says you are 22.
Thanks!
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Hi!
I am 22, as of September 8, 2008 :) So, a freshly-turned 22, at that. I've been on the site for over a year, as well.
Many websites (for example, a herpes one I visit frequently [Link](Mouse over link to see full location) ) has a section dedicated to parents who have given their offspring the virus. People are not just born with herpes, it is transmitted during delivery, infancy, or adulthood. In delivery, if the mother passes the virus along, the baby can be born blind and may suffer complications which could result in death.
There are so many posts about babies with herpes on their genital region, thighs, lips and gums, etc. Their outbreaks may be severe as infants but could taper off as their immune system grows stronger to this world. They may end up not having another outbreak until they are in their mid-twenties--never knowing that they carried the virus that entire time. For note, you can definately spread herpes without having ANY visible signs AT ALL! Now, that's something to scare you, coupled with the fact that over 80% of the United States is infected with this!
Yes, there are post upon post of parents going, "Little Suzy is STILL having a horrible breakout on her thigh! We were stupid and forgot to wash hands before changing her and she became infected! How can we help her symptoms, she seems very bothered by them!" I can even link them if you need further proof.
I also know of my trainer at the local Curves. She has HSV-1 (oral herpes) and apparently had spread it to her child--at a very young age. Her daughter, now an adult, has SCARS ON HER GUMS from outbreaks of herpes during infancy. She also has scars around her lips from them too. Guess what? She didn't know they were herpes until I said, "You know...there are a lot of supplements that help...well...you know...herpes outbreaks..." in which she went, "HERPES?!"
My mother had HSV-1 when I was growing up. We rarely shared eating utensils and the like, but, occassionally, I would have a sip of her drink on a cold day. I never, ever kissed anybody on the lips when I was 5, but I remember my first outbreak very clearly. The pain, swelling, uncomfortable feeling--plus, the embarrassment of having to go to school with a giant, swollen lip! My mother NEVER told me it was herpes or that she gave it to me--she acted as if it were completely normal. I am 22 and she STILL has not told me that what I experience is herpes. I went years not knowing that it was an STD, years that I could have spread it to my peers from pecks or sharing drinks. I was 5!
AIDS is commonly transferred from mother to offspring during delivery, which is why it is very complicated to give birth while trying to prevent the infection of the baby. This is also why the AIDs epidemic hasn't gotten any better--people, unknowingly infected, become pregnant and give birth, passing along the horrible disease during delivery.
STDs don't just poof out of no where. They originated somewhere, usually from people who were very unclean and sexually promiscuous. My theory is this:
If at some point someone DEVELOPED, say, gonorrhea before it had EVER been known of before, then it can be developed now. Assummingly this would happen from very unclean people, practically living in their own filth.
Condoms do not protect against STDs because they do not cover your entire body. Seriously.
You can contract chlamydia, gonorrhea, AIDS, herpes, etc. from an infected area touching you (and, yes, you can also get oral chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes too). Say the person has herpes, and they usually break out on the very tip of their penis. As they are sliding the condom on they accidentally touch the tip of their penis, but they aren't currently having an outbreak so they don't think to go wash their hands. They roll on the condom and touch their pubes lightly. Their pubes are, most definately, not covered by the condom so when it comes in contact with your bare vagina, well...oops!
This happens to all STDs, not just herpes. One person doesn't know they have something, something accidentally grazes you, unwashed hands (by the way, HPV can live in your finger nailbeds) and you've contract XYZ!
It's like, did you know that the Gardasil vaccine does not actually prevent HPV? Did you know there are over 100 strains of HPV and Gardasil only helps protect you from 5? Did you know that some STDs can literally eat away your brain within years, as it hides in your body with no visible symptoms?
Their are also tiny, tiny holes in condoms, much like pores that we have. These pores, believe it or not, are not small enough to prevent some STDs from slipping through. They are easily torn too (think of all the busted and ripped condoms you hear about) so they allow even more seepage through.
I get my information from my schooling, books, and the internet. I had a very good sexual health education class when I was in 3rd, 4th, and 5th grades. Some things I just know from that time in school. It's like:
How do you know you need to wash your hands before you eat?
Because that's what scientists told you was right and healthy. YOU didn't do the studies yourself, but you trust in the word of certain individuals. Well, I trust in the word of my schooling back then, plus some of it is just common-knowledge that, for some reason, this generation is not getting.
I get most of my statistics from online sources, which I usually list in my answer if I feel it's appropriate so if a percentage is used I can usually back that up. There are one or two things that I have long lost the informative website that included the number, but I know they are right so I have no problem in listing them.
I wouldn't post lies just for the hell of it, you see. I simply want people to understand, learn, and grow. I made mistakes when I was younger and I hope to prevent others from following that same path.
If you have questions regarding sex, I can usually answer them. If I don't know the answer, I can find it. I don't try to "scare" anyone--which I have gotten a few "You're just trying to scare me! GOSH!" responses, but it isn't true at all. I simply sit down and look through webpage after webpage until I find the right answer. I skim books at the library sometimes, trying to pick up a bit of information here and there. I read online forums to learn the horror that is hidden. I hear stories from people that surround me about these sorts of things.
Like I said, I've done things I've not been proud of. I've slept with 3 people, 2 of which were not the wisest choices. I've sat on my bed after sex, squeezing down a condom to see if it had any leaks after usage. I've had to take STD tests at the clinic to ensure my health. I've had to take a couple of home pregnancy tests when periods were late.
I've been depressed for losing my virginity, or sleeping with so-and-so. I've looked back and literally cried because of the mistakes I've made. I belittled myself, setting myself up for life-failure. I've looked at my younger siblings and went, "Why did I have to show them this! Why did I have to show them that all of this is acceptable!"
Somehow, I've made it through. I've learned some valuable lessons. I've retained some useful knowledge. I have grown to accept what I am, what I've done, where I'm going.
It's just been hard and I don't want others to follow me.
I am sorry if I wasn't clear in anything I've said here. I had a lot to say...and still more, but I am trying not to make you read a novel. I will just say this:
If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask me! :)
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