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Cutting
Hi, I'm hoping you can help me. & Not tell me to go talk to my school couslar or a professinal, my friends, or even my family. I won't do it.
I use to cut in 7th & 8th grade. (Wrists) I recently (about 5 months ago) cut on my leg because I couldn't take it. I told myself it's the last time I'd do it.
Well, I can't take it any longer. We're reading a book in English 2 where this kid cuts himself because of his life, Wanna know what I did when I had to read it? I cried. & I didn't read the rest.
I don't know who I can talk to without them telling my parents, or me going on 24/7 sucidide watch. I'm not that bad. I wanna talk to my favorite teacher, but I CAN'T.
What can I do to make myself not cut myself? I hate writing, running doesn't take my mind off anything, and I feel like my life is going down the drain. I never use to drink, I drink now, I think about smoking to cure my problems almost daily. & I even skip school now. Please, what do I do before I screw my life up?
I'm not sure I trust the teacher, she might tell my cousler on me.
I'll rate 5 if you answer asap, please.
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I was in a situation very, very similar to this my freshman year of high school.
I didn't want to tell anyone: not my parents, councilor, friends, etc.
I had a friend going through the same thing, so we tried helping each other. I tried to stop, but I realized that I couldn't do it on my own.
Also afraid that my favorite teacher would tattle on me, I wasn't sure if I wanted to tell her.
What I did:
I created a fake e-mail address (yahoo gives you a free address). I used a false name, etc on the address because I wasn't sure if there was any way for her to trace it back to me or anything. Yeah, I was paranoid, haha.
Anyway, I sent my favorite teacher an e-mail. I didn't say who I was, I just said I was one of her students. I told her that I trusted her and I needed help. I basically told her the gist of my problems and asked for advice.
We kept up the e-mail relationship for a little while before she realized it was me. It was obvious after a while.
She never told on me. She just wanted me to get better, and eventually I did.
Here I am 4 years later, I've graduated high school, I'm in college, I went to her baby shower this summer, and there's a high chance she'll give birth to her first child tomorrow on my 18th birthday. Just goes to show how close we became after she helped me through a really tough time in my life.
If you aren't going to tell anyone (even anonymously through e-mails), you need to do something to stop your destructive behavior.
I drank, smoked, ditched class, cut my wrists, and wanted to die. You may not be that bad now, but eventually it can and will progress and become worse.
My best friend died by drinking and driving, and I'm the one that handed her the keys. Every day I am reminded that her life ended and I was given the chance to continue on. I lived and her life was cut short.
That's my daily reminded to be careful of the choices I make in life. I would hate it if you had to have a tragic event in your life happen for you to realize how much you're harming yourself.
Then again, you're asking this question, so you know you're in trouble. Thank you for asking this because you want to get helped.
The only way to get help is to realize WHY you're doing what you're doing.
What made you cut in the first place? Why did you start drinking, smoking, and ditching class?
You need to get past the cause otherwise you'll never find a solution.
If it's solely because of your friends, you need to make new friends. About 80% of my friends from my freshman year of high school were horrible influences and as hard as it was, I had to go out into the world and make new friends. Here we are now, graduated, and my group is still friends. We don't need to party to have fun, we're don't need alcohol to act goofy, etc.
Live your life for you. Find what makes you happy and try avoiding what makes you sad.
If you continue getting worse, you may have to tell someone who will tell your parents.
They wouldn't put you on 24 hour suicide watch unless something really bad happened.
If you don't want your parents to find out what's going on, DO NOT speak to a guidance councilor. They are, by law, required to tell your parents if there is any harm coming to you.
Please, if you ever think that life is getting out of control, let me know and I'll do my best to help.
Also, if you are feeling suicidal, I strongly suggest speaking with your parents and getting help. Suicidal feelings can be treated with medication.
If you're ever really desperate to talk and can't find anyone, there is the suicide hotline (if you live in the US)
18007842433 or 18002738255
I hope everything turns out okay for you, and I really hope you speak to someone. Depression, cutting, smoking, drinking, etc at such a young age can really hurt you later in life. It's very difficult to stop these problems in general, and it's much more difficult to do it by yourself!
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