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Did I do the right thing?
Well, I'll start with the basics:
My best friend and I have been best friends for a couple years now. She has MAJOR codependency problems and flirts with/dates almost every single guy she meets. She is EXTREMELY clingy, and always just HAS to be with me every second of every day, which isn't fair to my other friends. A lot of people chose to dislike her for these reasons, but I thought our friendship was strong because I could ignore these little things. She's pretty much trying to be me. She started to draw just because she found out I liked to doodle, she claimed to know how to play the guitar, just because I was learning. It's like she has no opinion of her own, she always agrees with what i'm saying! Example:
Her: Oh I'm SO going for McCain! He's the best!
Me: I like Obama...
Her: Oh yeah, me too. I hope Obama wins!
(An actual conversation we had)
You see what I mean? Not to mention she's really bipolar. So, another of my friends and I went up to her about a week or 2 ago and confronted all of her "issues". We said, "You don't have to change for us, but it would make everything a lot easier". We stayed calm so she wouldn't be offended, and explained everything perfectly. Well, apparently our friendship wasn't strong enough for her to want to fix the bad things. She continued doing all of these things and it was quite obvious that she did not even attempt to change at all.
Well, last Friday, we were at a local football game. She completely ditched me to go hang out with some dude she'd just met (while she STILL had a boyfriend.) and flirted with him all night. I happened to run into a guy that broke both of our hearts and we both disliked him VERY much, so I called her to warn her. She said she was "not into that boy drama anymore" which is the MOST ridiculous things i've ever heard come from her mouth. She pretty much starts all the boy drama because she flirts with everyone, cheats on most of them, and then is shocked when she gets dumped by them. Well, just when she said that, something clicked, and I realized "wow, why am I friends with this girl? She lies, she steals my personality, she does everything we told her not to do and doesn't even try to change!"
After that night, I thought about it over the weekend and decided to just not be her friend. I know it sounds childish, but I put a lot of thought into it before I decided to end this 2 year friendship. I knew there was no way I was going to be able to go back once it was done, and i'm glad I did it because it's like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. So much drama has left along with her and i'm so much happier! Unfortunately, eve after I explained clearly, but not in a harsh way, why we couldn't be friends, she just couldn't comprehend why. She's been crying, talking to the people she thinks are her friends, talking about how she has no friends and her dad abuses her ( Which is a complete lie). Anything to make people feel sorry for her, which isn't working. Now, my question is, did I do the right thing? I gave her a chance after I talked to her the first time, and she blew it. Should I have given her another chance?
Thanks so much for taking the time to read all of this!
:)
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I do think you made the right choice. I mean she had the chance to change her ways. You have been dealing with this for two years now. I mean enough is enough! I would probably do the same thing. Just make sure she doesn't turn people against you. If she is doing that then talk to either her, or somebody else about it. I hope this helps you. =]
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ok i think that if she ditches you again then you should turn around and just leave to hang out with ppl who really want to be there for you it really just sounds like she wants attention and this is the only way she knows how to get it so if she keeps acting this way then dont answer when she calls dont acknowlege when she starts drama act like everything is fine and that she doesnt affect you in anyway you need to let her know that your there for her but she needs to be willing to change before anyone else can help her so if you show her your perfectly happy without her drama it might make her realize she needs to lose the act and get real
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