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routine
I met my boyfriend the summer of last year. That summer was one of the best summers of my life. At the time, neither of us had anything going, we were both off from school and both unemployed… but we had each other. He was relaxed then, always made me laugh, and he was so fun to be around… By the time summer was over he had a school schedule, but he made his efforts to see me, and with it only being twice a week, that was good enough for me, cause we still had our long conversations over the phone… But by the time January came along, we started having some fights, he never had time, but I got over those fights, I knew I loved him, so I supported him in everything he did, and he did the same for me… But this summer, it’s like he’s turned into a different person. Our conversations have become dull, even with my efforts of making them fun. I answer the phone, and I get flirty with him, but it’s like he doesn’t even respond to it. When I do actually get lucky enough for him to spend time with me, he never wants to do anything fun, but stay at home, and lay in bed, and watch a movie. He doesn’t touch me much either, unless he wants to have sex, But when we’re out in public, I’m usually the one reaching for his hand, kissing him, or putting my arm around him. When we do have sex, it’s great… the only problem is that, I feel like that’s the only time I actually feel close to him nowadays. That feeling seems to be gone, once the sex is gone.
I still love him very much, but my question is, do you think he’s still in love with me, and is me making an effort to make this work even worth it anymore?
He tells me that he loves me, and when I ask him if he’s sure, he says he is. And he always tells me that he would never lie to me, and so far, he never has. I do trust him, but his actions don’t really express his love anymore. Maybe he truly is just too busy, and I’m just being paranoid?
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No, your not being paranoid. I would wonder about the same thing. Ok, well i have two options for you.
Option 1- He may not be in love like he did the summer you met him. The relationship just might not be going anywhere because of him not wanting to do anything or having dull convo's.
Option 2- Maybe he is stressed out over something and has a lot of stuff going on with school, work, etc.
What i would do is whenever you're having dull convo's again or if he is acting like that again, just tell him exactly what you wrote on here. Tell him all your feelings so he knows what you feel like and you know what's going on with him. You shouldn't have a relationship where you only feel close to your partner during sex. I know this is hard for you and no girl should have to go through this. Guys are so complicated! Hope this helps!
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its every girls nature to worry about these things. Trust me....no matter if its years months weeks or days women worry all the time if they are still the girl that their man wants...you have to be able to put yourslef aside and let him know how you are feeling just like you have written here but make sure he knows that if it is becuase he is busy that you do understand and that you will still be there to support him just the when you feel his touch its like the love has escaped from his grasp. if he does choose to leave then he wasnt the one for you love comes and goes many times especially for women just know that no matter what you will be able to handle everything....
and
ps
this is my advice to myself as well because i was having the same thoughts with my boyfriend.
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