I feel guilty about everything. Like, for example, if I don't do something such as ride a rollercoaster (I hate rollercoasters) or eat my vegetables before I eat my meat (yeah, something silly like that). I feel like I'm supposed to do everything 'normal'. Like the normal way to do stuff. Everything has to be traditional or else I feel sorta like it will fall apart or something. I don't even really know. It's hard to explain I guess.
I like things done in a traditional way or the normal way. Like if my parents ask me to go to the beach, even though I really don't like the beach, I'll say yes but not because I want to or I'm being nice. Going to the beach with your family is something you're supposed to do because it's a summer tradition. If I were not to go with them, I'd feel insanely guilty. Does this make any sense?
Another example: My high school life isn't exactly going as I would like it too. My dad always talks about how he had so many friends and how he'd go to all the parties and junk like that. Well, my friends sorta all abandoned me this year and I've never gone to a single party. And I feel really guilty about that. I feel like I'm missing out on a normal thing and that I'll look back at this in twenty years and be filled with regret and guilt.
So it's semi-big things like that as well as stupid things like feeling guilty if I don't eat my vegetables before my meat.
I don't know why I feel this way all the time. Any advice or anything?
I would also like to add... 'Normal' is an ideal... In reality this ideal is more subjective than anything else. All people are different. We all think, feel, act and react differently. Just because you perform an action differently than some of the people around you... Doesn't make you or what you're doing abnormal or wrong. You're doing just fine and you're going to be just fine.
So you haven't been to a party. Big deal. I didn't attend parties during school either. I graduated into adulthood just like everyone else... I have a job, an apartment, bills, family, friends, a relationshi... Just like everyone else. Don't sweat the small stuff ;) [ Missa8305's advice column | Ask Missa8305 A Question ]
solidadvice4teens answered Sunday July 27 2008, 6:36 pm: This sounds as though it could be obsessive behavior. I'm not saying you have a disorder but you do seem to do a lot of things in patterns or a certain way or you freak out. That's common with a few mental health issues including OCD.
Maybe it's something psychiatric that you have no control over. I'm not sure where the guilt comes from. Perhaps you know you're missing out because you have to repeat the same pattern and know you should just let things unfold but physically won't allow yourself to.
Your social life is suffering because people can sense your anxiety and that there's something different about the way you act. You're also not spontaneous or outgoing either. Try joining clubs, student council etc. and get in there and meet people.
You're trying to force yourself to do things a certain way or out of your comfort zone and feeling bad when you can't change. I think you should talk to a doctor preferably a psychiatrist about this and see if it's a disorder or not. if it is therapy and medication might suppress it.
In the meantime eat your meat first for once and don't worry about it. The sky won't fall if you do. Start there and try to do something different than the "normal" way (which is really a compulsive way) and see and learn that there's nothing to feel guilt over.
It won't kill you also to tell family or anyone else you would rather stay at home than go to the beach. They'll understand completely. Like I said all of this is appearing to be mental and you should seek help from a mental health professional to handle it. [ solidadvice4teens's advice column | Ask solidadvice4teens A Question ]
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