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suicidal ex-boyfriend
Okay well lets say his names bob,well i just broke up with bob like two weeks ago because he was flirting with this girl saying i hit that and hey sexy and stuff.Well anyways bob was talking to me about how his going to change and stuff and i was also talking to his bestfriends and they said that his been acting like a dick. Then when i seen him for the fourth of july for the first time sence then he was drunk really badly. Then awhile i was talking to bobs friends and i asked them why his been acting like that they said because he wont let go of me. Then when I tried to talk to him on myspace today he would barely talk to me.My two closest friends said that they think if he gets drunk that bad again he might
kill his self.
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If you feel he may cause himself harm,
tell his parents so they can deal with
it and then just move on.
If he is really having a problem
getting over you then stay clear
away from him until he has dealt
with his feelings. Don't aggravate
the situation by trying to talk to
him on myspace or anywhere else.
Tell your 2 closest friends that
you don't want to hear gossip
about him. You need to get over
it too and that isn't helping. :)
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First off: What makes them think that he might do that? Just because he won't let go of you? Or has he said or done something to give them that idea? Because they could just be exaggerating, and if not then it could be a serious issue.
If what they are saying IS true, then do NOT get back together with him just because of that, unless you still like him and want to be with him again. Because doing that and leading him on or just being with him out of pity will not help the situation, only make it worse. Then in the end both of you will be unhappy, or even something more extreme given his situation.
Somethings I don't understand though, if he was flirting with other people and not showing too much interest in the relationship, then why is he so broken up about it now? And if he won't let go of you, then why won't he talk to you when given the chance. I don't know, some of these things just don't really add up...
Finally, how well do you know his friends? Like, how close to them are you? Because I feel like they're giving you very mixed signals. First they tell you that he's being a dick, then they say how he can't get over you and he's going to kill himself. Are you absolutely positive that they're not making some of this stuff up? And how did you find out about him flirting with that other girl/do you know if he was being serious or just joking around? He said he'd made the effort to change, but his friends said he was being a dick. I don't really get that. That he was being a dick to you, or to them?
If I were you I'd basically just try to find out as much TRUE information (pref. from reliable sources) as you can. But don't ask your ex if he ever mentioned anything related to suicide. Because if it's a lie, that could be damaging to him. And if it's true, he could feel betrayed by his friends.
I'd just advise you to make sure his friends are being completely honest with you...
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Okay, I don't know exactly what you're asking, but I'm guessing you're wondering what to do about this. Let's just go with this first, no matter what Bob does, this is not your fault. Bob was betraying your trust and you had every right to break up with him. Don't just go back out with him because you don't want him to kill himself, you're just hurting yourself and him even more.
Now, as for Bob, the only thing you can do is talk to him. Tell him that you've noticed he's been upset, and you don't want him to do anything stupid over you. Tell him, if this is really bad then he should get help. Even help him find good help if you feel you should. Tell his parents too, so they can keep tabs on his drinking and depression.
But remember, no matter what heppens, it really isn't you're fault.
-Calli
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