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ive had this problem ever since i was little.
14/m
i have a big problem here. im going into highschool this year and i havent had a girlfriend in such a long time. the last time i had a girlfriend was back in december and it was a girl in a lower grade then me. and i have lots of friends and everything and i guess im popular. ive mad friends with pretty much all the attractive girls. and if i would ask any of them out they all say "were too good of friends" and dont even give me a chance. it makes me so frustrated. i think they are lying to me and just saying that as an excuse. ive tried changing myself so they will like me but it doesnt work. i think its because im fat. i think im fat. i just want to know why none of my friends will date me?? it makes me so sad and it makes me want to give up
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Hey.
I just want you to know that you're not alone. When I was in middle school, I pretty much liked all of my girl friends, and none of them wanted to date me because we were "too good of friends". And honestly, they were right. Of course, I didn't realize it then, and I thought that there was something wrong with me. Then as we started to grow up, a few of them told me that they wish they would have dated me back then, or how good of a boyfriend I would be, etc.
And I had to laugh. Because if I had dated them, it would have just ended badly anyway, like all of my relationships thus far. So I guess what I'm telling you is don't be in such a rush to get a girlfriend. I know it can be so thrilling and exciting, but when it ends badly, you start to reexamine dating completely. You're only 14 and you have many years ahead of you left to date. Don't feel like you have to now, because sometimes all it does is bring unnecessary pain, and trust me, dude, that's not something you need. Been there and done that.
--Jack
(16/m)
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You should realize that your problem is, at 14, most people are not ready to have girlfriends/boy friends. A large portion of these girls aren't considering you, because they don't want a boyfriend period.
You should be working on friendships during this stage in life, not trying to find your life partner, (that is the reason for dating you know). You are looking for your life partner at age 14? You looking to get married at 15? You often find what you are looking for, when you're not looking for it. Stop prioritizing the wrong things, focus on what is really going to help you, like finding out more about yourself, who you are and what is really important, that is when the girls will start finding you interesting.
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Hey,
don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes we just don't think of you that way. Maybe the problem is just simply that you're a good friend. Sometimes we feel the boundary between friend and boyfriend needs to not be crossed.
Think about your personality- are you the type of person who is a "good friend" or are you a "good boyfriend." I mean, do you think people think of you as "boyfriend material"? If so then just keep searching. If not then what makes you not? if it's just that you seem like a "just friend" type of person then you just have to wait it out until you find someone who likes that. If it's because you're too immature around girls maybe(or something like that)then try and change- but don't change your personality for a girl. I guarentee there's a girl out there for you. You just have to wait until you find her.
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I know what your going through except that i didn't really have ANY friends that were girls/ not popular.
It doesn't matter weather you have a girlfriend or not. You don't need one.
Your honestly better off being friends with your friends because your going to have friends forever but a girlfriend will last a few months, maybe years if your lucky. Don't try to change yourself to get someone to like you. A real relationship that you want is one where you can be yourself and the person likes you for yourself.
Trust me you will be so much happier when you know the person likes you for you, and not just what your showing them.
About being fat, well thats up for you to judge.
If you think you are do something about it, cut back on sweets, do some exercise, eat some fruits n veggies.
Some friends could not like you like that and are just being nice, or some just do feel that way. (because many times when good friends go out they end up disliking each other after break up)
Don't give up you will eventually find someone but your only 14, you got a long road ahead to find a girlfriend/wife.
Hope it helped
~InsaneChildz~
15/m
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