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Mom being psycho?
f/15 and sorry, this will be long :/ i live with my great aunt, i refer to her as my grandma, my mom is an ex drug addict who was never there, she's got another kid now, and she stopped drugs. she tries to be all parental whenever she visits though. i'm talking, overly parental. every little thing she wants me to get permission from her for, and she doesn't even have legal custody of me. my grandma, she is way passive. she accepts me for me, but if my mom gives her an evil glare and raises her voice she gives in to her. seriously, i dont know what to do, i try talking to her, and she screams at me, and tells me i'm being a smartass, and she tells me i look like shit, that i need to be normal, and i'm talking to a "normal" guy, he's really southern, but he likes me too. and she keeps telling me how freakish i am, and how i need to be normal, and how he won't like me, and what i need to change to keep him around. i keep trying to talk to her, and she just yells at me. everytime she visits i end up crying. i usually wait till she leaves, but she's honestly gotten so rude i cry in front of her, then she yells at me more. she tells me to grow up and stuff, but i'm overly emotional. like i said, i've tried talking to her, but it never works. i just need to know what to do. i've also tried talking to my grandma, and stuff, but nothing ever works. my mom always ends up yelling at me and making me feel worthless.
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I'm very sorry that your mother treats you this way. I think that maybe she tries to make you perfect possibly because she wasn't able to be there for you earlier. It's gotta be frustrating for you though. I'm sorry that she's always trying to cut you down.
But you should remember that when she's tearing you down, it's mainly out of her own insecurities. And, though she's your mother, don't let the insults get to you. She probably doesn't even mean most of them. I wouldn't try talking to her about it, as you've done that already and it hasn't worked out to well.
I think the best thing to do at this point would be to just 'hear' what she's saying when she's insulting you, but don't actually listen. By this I mean, try not to let it sink in...just have it go in one ear and out the other. Don't respond, that could just fuel the fire. Obviously, when she's asking you as a parent to do something, you should listen to her. I just mean when she's cutting into you, pay no mind to what she says.
You are you, and you can't change that...even for her. So don't try anymore. You're not worthless, always remember that. =]
I hope this works out for you.
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I am not quite sure the question but i know the answer, i think...haha well pretty much you have to stand up to her. i know shes your mother but its not right her making you feel worthless. Just before she comes, get ready, and know you are pretty, and smart, and strong. THen go out and talk to her, if she yells at you, just calmly tlak to her and never raise your voice but never break down. If she yells at you more, stop talking and wait for her to finish, then say "there is no need for yeling, i just want to talk to my MOTHER" [[CAPITALISEING MEANS BE SARCASTIC]] and it will throw her off guard. Just let her yell and speak calmly. i know it may seem hard but it will work and she wil stop yelling. Hope i helped!
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