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we are finally going out! but it is confusing...
16/m gay
this is a very long story. i have had the biggest crush on this guy (call him bob) since i met him two years ago. well, me and someone else (call him bill) started goin out, but i still liked bob. well, now bob has finally told me that he wants to go out. so i broke up with the bill (which caused a BIG emotional scene), but i think it was the right thing to do.
but yeah, i really like bob, and he is finally giving us a chance. we are gonna see each other next month. we live a couple of hours apart, so we dont see each other a lot. my main thing is, that i dont wanna seem to desperate, cause i dont wanna scare him, but i dont wanna give him the impression that i dont care about us goin out, cause i have been waiting for this for so long.
also, because i really like him, i would probably do anything he wanted to do, even if it went against my morals. and i mean have sex with him. i want to do that, but i dont want to because i think it might seem kinda desperate after going out for only a month. he knows i have liked him for a long time, and he has liked me too. the reason he never went out with me before was because he didnt want me to have to go through all the pain of a long distance relationship (i had been through it before).
i need to know what i should do when we get to see each other. neither of us want other people to know that we are going out, so whatever we do will happen in private, which makes it more likely that we will go too far. i need to know how not to go too far. i love him, and he loves me. but, i dont want to lose myself to him after going out with him for only a month. i do eventually plan on losing myself to him, probably on his birthday (because he turns 16), but i dont want to before then.
i just need advice on how to go through all of this, because we only get to see each other a couple of times a year, and i want those times to be memorable for both of us, but not to the point where either of us will go to far and ruin the relationship
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well dont let it pressure you to do things if you dont want to. love him with all of your heart but dont let him take that and step on it. if you really LOVE him then make it work if it is meant to be there is a way to get it to work with the long distance. try to see him as much as possible and if that is not alot make the best of the time you can see eachother...why in private?
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There are other ways to do things, that aren't exactly sex. Don't over think all of this. When you see him, read his actions and body language. If making out leads to other sorts of sexual activity-- then do what you feel is right at the time.
I'm very careful about the people I hook up with. I have never been with a person who I didn't love, or at least want to love. But I do know that hooking up can really bring two people closer together. It can strengthen a bond more then you ever knew.
When you do those things with another person, especially for the first time-- you're giving a lot to the other person. They're seeing your body, and seeing a part of you that they haven't before. It's special, and beautiful-- especially when you are in love.
I wish the best for you, but hope that you don't over-evaluate this date you have with him the future. If you love each other, then everything will fall together when you see him.
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