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Do You Think....
I have a frined whos in a relationship, and is engaged. Well yesterday she told me that she likes someone....whos not her fiance. She says that she is still in love with her fiance, its just that she likes this other guy as more than a friend.
Now my question is: Do you think its possible to be in love with someone, but like someone else? Because the way I look at it if you say youre in love with someone, you shouldnt like someone else cause that, to me, shows that you dont love the person.... What does every one else think?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
How do you think people have multiple loves.
Why do you think people have affairs.
She can still love her fiance and also like another guy. Just because you have a fiance that doesnt mean you are incapable of liking another. People are still found attractive. lol
Also, her love for him can be as real as ever, but she is attracted to this other guy as well.
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I think you are very wrong about that.
Although there is something bewitching about the idea of the one perfect love and never wanting anything (or anyone) else, that simply isn’t a rational expectation for most people.
Love isn't a cure all. It doesn't fix all your problems, or change who you are and it doesn't make you blind and deaf to the other people around you.
When you love someone, you choose them, and choose to put them first, but you can't just magically stop finding other people attractive, either sexually or romantically.
You can be in love, and Brad Pitt would still be sexy, and the cute guy at Starbucks might still make you blush when he compliments you. You might even find at some point, feelings start to run deeper then that. That doesn’t make anyone a horrible person, only human.
The simple truth is that our feelings are not reliable. If we only ever listened to our feelings we would never stay in love with anybody. Not a single marriage on this planet would last if we indulged every passing feeling, or even half of them! We would get angry, frustrated, bored, and restless. Maybe we would feel a passing fancy for someone else and we would just dump our past love. It is impossible to expect to be feeling love every second of every day, no matter how much you love someone. Our brains and bodies don’t work that way.
The best thing you can do is not judge her for her feelings. As long as she is keeping her actions loving and respectful to her fiancé, this could be an important lesson for her in how to maintain her choices despite her passing attractions. She might also just have some fears and insecurities she is working through before the marriage OR she might be coming to terms with her own unhappiness in the relationship.
This doesn’t mean she doesn’t love him. It means she is human and struggling to make choices in her life.
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