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an old friend
heyy there advicenators!
so i know you guys must be SICK of friendship questions about a troubled young woman who has a supposed 'best friend' who obviously treats her like diarrhea in a toilet, but this may be a little bit different... i need a new perspective on this situation. i don't necessarily need a solution that will save my life, i just want your opinion.
i have this amazingg friend, and we met at a social gathering almost 4 years ago. in any case, we met, and it turned out we were both the same age but attended different schools. so we became really good friends and after like a year or two BEST friends. we'd talk like everyday and there were SOO many advantages because she didn't go to my school so i could talk about anyone and say anything, knowing that even if she hated me to death, she could never tell anyone.
so like my birthday was a few months ago, and i told her like two or three months before my birthday that i want to get together with her on / around my birthday, and she was like, "yeah sure!" so we planned it all out, and it turned out i had to cancel for some reason and she was like aww ok we can just reschedule
well like after that .. four months later.. hahaha like we haven't really talked. like i KNOW she's not like suddenly extremely angry with me or anythingg cause nothing has happened ... and like she's a very busy person so you'd assume she's just busy and can't get back to me but i've tried sending her wall posts and emails and IMs and she just like doesn't respond.. like wall post wise, the last time i sent her one was likeeee ten days ago, and i said something simple like, "heyy how've you been?" and i shot her several emails being like, "heyy we haven't talked in a while what's been new with you?" -- i feel like the only way i can find out what's going on with her life is through her facebook statuses!
well i'm really really sad cause like.. idk what to do. like if she's really busy then i don't wanna keep bothering her but she's wall posting other people back. she tends to just overlook certain notifications and apologize profusely several days later... but like what should i do? should i try calling her home phone asking if she's free?
i feel so badlyyy. like we've had issues in the past where we've gone weeks without not talking and then we sent like a verbal diarrhea email except those don't really work with her because she doesn't have enough time to write a really long email.. short messages work better, but she forgets to respond :( hahaha so i don't know
i doubt she's mad at me and is ignoring me voluntarily because i'm still on her facebook top friends (which she does update) and this has happened before but not for THIS long. should i just wait for herr? hahah.. i don't know.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
First off, well done on the diarrhea in a toilet analogy.
These things happen to friendships, and sometimes what is needed to add some life to your relationship are some words. Saying something on AIM or Facebook doesn't have nearly the same affect as saying it over the phone. Chatting on the computer is like talking to a shell of the person, while talking on the phone is real.
So, I suggest calling her and setting up a time to hang out or whatever. Hearing your voice will probably be a breath of fresh air to her.
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Well here's my two cents. This is what I'd do and have done in the past. If I can't catch my friend on IM or email I'll give him a call a week or so later. If he refuses my calls or never answers I show up at his door. If he isn't there, I leave a note. We may go months without saying a word, then he'll contact me. I basically put the ball in his court. He knows I've been trying to get in touch with him, so I just wait until he replies back. Matter of fact, after a month of not hearing anything, I finally got an email from him yesterday. Now I understand why he hasn't contacted anyone. So, just give your friend the benefit of the doubt. Call her up. She may be the one who is really needing a friend.
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Thanks for the rating and yes I read your reply. My friend lives far away too. That's why I leave a note. He then knows I took the time and trouble to drive all the way over there. I live in Fort Worth and he lives in Dallas.
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