my best friend (we'll call him Bob) and i have decided that we both like eachother and we're about to go out. but then i found out some disturbing news. bob has this friend, (Gretta), and they had sex. my other friend, (fred) told me this. it happened about a month ago. fred kept saying that he had to tell me something about bob before we could go out. and he said i really should know because its important and ect ect ect. so he told me that there are two stories to this: GRETTA'S STORY: she fell asleep and bob was next to her. she was drunk-ish. (and shes 13, if that says anything, shes also a real slut. so yeah.) so she fell asleep and he raped her. she called her brother and told him and he was about to come and beat bob's ass for it. bob's brother got a gun to scare him off and it worked. and now gretta isnt speaking to bob. but see, the thing is, gretta has been known to either stretch the truth or lie completely. anyways, BOB'S STORY: gretta and bob were messing around. gretta was shitfaced and pulled his pants off and they had sex. then she got freaked and called her brother and lied to him and then the rest is the same. and the thing here is that bob used to like gretta. and they went out. and it didnt work. and he's allegedly still liked her while liking me. and hes also not known to lie about something like that. he i know for a fact he DID NOT WANT ME TO KNOW. he'd kill fred if he found out fred told me! but i need him to know that i know! i dont want there to be any tension between us because of this! please give me any advice on how to let him know that i know. in a subtle way. sorry this is so long but it was a long story! THANKS!
Additional info, added Thursday March 27 2008, 4:47 pm: oh, and fred, bob, and i are all 15. and gretta is sorta kinda my frend, but not really. but like i said, shes a slut and shes had sex with a lot of guys.. Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? WhiteDestiny09 answered Thursday March 27 2008, 7:58 pm: I agree with Flawless about Gretta. Don't worry about her. If you trust that Bob wouldn't lie, then believe Bob. However, I think you should confront him subtlety, like you think you should. Wait until you are alone, then say something like, "Bob, there is something I have to tell you. I realize it may be a little personal on your part, but..." and proceed to tell him. Or fib a little and say something like "I heard that someone had sex with that girl, Gretta." See how he reacts. If he acts innocent, he's not lying. If he gets shifty-eyed and fidgety, then he is lying. Just let him know that you are also there for him to talk to about anything personal. You both have to be open to the relationship, and one of the biggest things you can have in a relationship is trust, right up there with honesty, honor, and loyalty. [ WhiteDestiny09's advice column | Ask WhiteDestiny09 A Question ]
FlaWlessMonoLith answered Thursday March 27 2008, 6:37 pm: First off, I'd bring up being a virgin. say "I wanna ask you something, though its kinda a personal question." Then if he says go ahead and ask, then you can ask him if he's a virgin or not. See what his answer is and maybe ask him about how many girls he's had sex with and blah blah. You might be able to get it out of him. If he wants to know why your asking then say its something you want to know before you go off and date people. Or you can confront him right there about it, but that wouldnt be the best thing if your not supposed to know about it. As it sounds, I REALLY don't think he raped her. People are stupid like that. If she's so defensive saying he raped her, she's probably out for attention. She shouldn't of gotten drunk and let herself be so easy. I wouldnt really worry about it. [ FlaWlessMonoLith's advice column | Ask FlaWlessMonoLith A Question ]
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