well when i first started to like him in april.
we discussed our wants and he knew i didn't want to be with him like that. im skeptical. i don't exactly fall easily or trust easily. i think it had to do with my childhood. my dad wasn't exactly the best person, he left us on and off about 9 times in the 18 years of my life. he knows a lot about my past and he knows i trust him more than anyone. but way before i met him, i told myself i would never date any of my close guy friends, because i don't want to mess things up. i'm not exactly boy crazy either.. i think the crap my dad did has affect on that, but anyways. i never exactly had a relationship for that reason, but i've had past on and off crushes slighty. but i'm now a senior. and in the 4 years of my high school career i've liked about 7 guys or so? i don't know..in the past few months, i had i think 3 on and off, that i've liked in the past years.. if that makes sense..but he always overpowered them. i just, yeh.. it's kinda hard.. we live under 2 miles away from each other..and we see each other a lot in school..and were in 2 clubs together afterschool. its difficult but i want to make this work.
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