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should i move in???
i've been with my boyfriend for 4yrs and we lived together for 3yrs.6mnths ago he moved out of state.he wanted me to come with him,but i had some commitments that i just couldn't leave.since then we've been having lots of problems,we even broke up and got back together.i feel like am the only one trying to make this work because for some reason he's soo relaxed about this whole thing.now i think moving to him will actually save this relationship,but am afraid he wouldn't want me to move since he's enjoying he's indepency and am the only one making this work.should i move??
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
4 years is a long time. I don't think
I would throw it away very easily.
You need to have a very serious talk
before pulling up roots and moving.
You need a face to face talk about
this. You should be able to tell by
looking at him how he really feels.
If you are done with your former
commitments ask him to come visit.
You could go to him too, either way.
Ask the serious questions because
there is no sense in uprooting
yourself only to have it be over
soon. Move with absolutley no
doubt in your mind that you have a
future there.
Ask if he still wants you to move there.
Ask where he sees your relationship going
in the future. Make sure it matches what
you want. Ask how he has been spending
his spare time. Are you going to fit in
with this new lifestyle or be waiting on
him while he continues nights out with
the guys or whatever he is now doing?
Tell him your worries and fears. Give
him a chance to ease them.
Just talk to him. Don't give up those
4 years without having all the facts.
But don't just move hoping for the best.
I hope it all works out for you. :)
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It kinda depends on how big the commitment is sweetie. I know moving out of state is stressful. But would it really be worth it. You said you have already broken up once and he doesn't seem to be making too much of an effort to get you to move. Maybe this isn't meant to be? There a reason for everything. Try and remember that. You need to find out what's best for you and put yourself first before anyone else. This is your life and can't always change it back to the way it was. It might be hard to let him go. Givve a few more days of thought ask your friends how they feel. Think about it. Your life is here and you want to move out of state with this man. Think about jobs, money, starting over... is this what you want?
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