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my boyfriend is self concious.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months and he is SOOO down on himself. And no matter what I say to him, his thoughts don't change. I never lie to him about what I think of him!! and i think he thinks i do. and i think he thinks im going to leave him for someone better.. AND IM NOT!!! he's the best ive gotten (i think) but he's so low on himself. I find him hott!! lol and really attractive, and i tell him he's always hott not because i wanna make him feel better but it just comes out of my mouth!! and when we do stuff (sexually) I act like myself I dont PRETEND to want him.. I don't know how to realize how special he is and how good looking he is. One of the reasons he thinks hes ugly and fat is because of his mom.. and i hate her for it because i hate seeing him hurt and thinking untrue things about himself!! and even though he moved out of his moms, he still sees himself in that light.
please help me!! i really want him to finally realize i dont have pitty on him!! and that i date him because i want to not because i feel bad!!!!!!
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If he has been put down all his life by his main carer, his Mum, then it will take him a very long time to learn that he is a very valuable member of the human race.
He will only start to have faith in himself with maturity and a lot of support from you. However, try being supportive with actions and not words, because as YGSgirl said it may continue to remind him. If he is up for it maybe talking through his feelings with a professional could help him put the past where it belongs.
Also, if his Mum continues to put him down he needs to tell her how he feels and ask her not to keep on.
I wish you both the very best.
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Well, truth be told, HE is the only one to realize this. You can't make him not look down on himself.
Don't keep reminding him that you don't date him out of pity, that doubtfully helps the situation.
Try just showing him that you think these things, because actions speak louder than words. Plus, sometimes words just remind him of how he feels in the first place.
That is all I can tell you, and I hope you get more answers.
ygs-29/f
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