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High school
Hey, i have noticed that your answers were really helpful and i need loads of adivce for what im going through right now.
Im 14/f and just started high school a month ago. Getting straight to the point, most of the guy are getting on my nerves. There is this one guy that sits behind me in english class, and im so confused about the kind of realtionship we have. Let me explain. On the first day of school, he asked his friend to ask me for my number. Then, the teacher moved his desk behind me. We talk in english class, but thats it. Once in a while he would actually say something outside of class, but thats rare. Also, today these two guys called me a bitch. We were in drama class, and i was trying to get my group members to work but they wouldnt. I was really polite but i kept telling them to please work and help out. They didnt want to work, they just wanted to stand around and talk/flirt with the other girls. And when i started to get on their case about working, they would put their heads together and start wispering about me. How rude and disreaspectful. I cant get this out of my head, but i should because i know that i am not a bitch, i just care about my schoolwork. I dont know why this is bothering me so much. Also, i feel like such a loner/outsider/nerd in drama class. I would be trying to talk to the guys, telling them where to go but it would be just like talking to a wall! They would just divert their attention somewhere else or not listen to me or totally reject my ideas. Im the only one in my drama group actually working. The guys would go and hug some girl, and then come back to me, and i would just be standing there, like a loser, waiting for them to come back to do the work. I just feel so, out of it right now. I have been so down since high school started. Please help.
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Thanks for asking me this. I hope I'm at least a bit helpful with this :)
Basically in high school everyone tries to fit in & everyone's nervous, at a different maturity level, etc. Mixing all of these people together is going to cause conflicts just like the one you're having in drama class. You're right in tryig to get everyone to work. At the same time, they're just trying to have fun, too. I don't see anything bad about joking around & such for a few minutes before you all get to work; it'll get everyone in a better mood. Is there a teacher in this drama class? Try enlisting their help if no one will cooperate and work together. Once everyone is more comfortable in the group (you included) things should work out a lot better. Try doing some ice breaker activities, they seem lame but they're actually really fun & get people involved in the group more.
As for the guys calling you a bitch, they're just immature. Also, look at your behaviour- you could be coming off to them as a bitch without realizing it. Smile and say hi, it'll go a long way. It's also possible that they just don't like you, it's not the end of the world if they don't, not everyone gets along with everyone (you'll find that out too if you haven't already). The guy you're talking to in english class- do you like him? If so (and you actually want him to know) be a bit more direct about it because as of now, he most likely sees you as "That Girl in My English Class Who Talks to Me Every Day". Nothing wrong with that, either.
Freshmen year is confusing and fun all at once. Focus on your OWN work, and if no one else wants to work, too bad for them, right? Just enjoy yourself as best you can & it'll be a great year, I promise :)
-LM
[15/f]
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