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missing out on friday
on friday, my friend is having a sleepover at her house with like 5 other girls or something. i was invited but i couldn't go because i have something to do with my family. my problem is, whenever i can't go somewhere, even if it's not that big of a deal, my one friend has to make it like "the best time ever" and make me feel soo bad about msising out. it sucks though, cause when i miss ONE thing it's like they talk about it for EVER, and like plan all this stuff based around it just cause i wasn't there. but then like, if i had been there it wouldn't have been that big of a deal. she just tries to make me feel left out sometimes it feels like, and she tries to make it seem like it was soooo much fun and that because of 1 thing i missed all my other friends are sooo much closer and im on the outside. it doesnt always happen that way, but sometimes, and because of it, i feel bad about misisng one little thing. i know it's stupid, but what should i do?
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Wow, I have a friend like that, too. And what I've figured out is, the best thing to do is to NOT show that it bothers you. Because that's why she's doing it. She's trying to make you feel jealous and left out. I don't know why... probably she's jealous of you for some reason... but whatever the reason, her goal is to make you feel bad. And when she sees that it's upsetting you, she knows its working and she'll keep doing it.
So you need to beat her at her own game.
The best thing to do is act really happy for them for all the fun they had! Laugh about it and say, "Wow, it sounds like you guys had a great time!" or "I'm so glad you all got to do that!". Try to sound as genuinely happy for them as you can. And then change the subject and act like you totally don't care that you weren't there and you're not even thinking about it anymore. Just keep being happy and cheerful.
Once she sees that her little plan to make you sad isn't working, she'll give it up. It worked with my friend, and I bet it will work with yours.
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What you should do you when you have some time is talk to your friend about the sleepover. You should tell her that you really don't appreciate it when she rubs it in your face like that, and that you would have loved to have gone but you must do something with your family. She will understand if you tell her your expectations, and will be less likely to leave you out.
Hope this helps!
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