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your heart vs. your best friend?
This is really common I know. Sorry for that Here is the thing...back in January I met this kid..and we talked and what not..and during the same time..I was having some difficulties at home, and I don't like to talk about my problems because some can't keep stuff to themselves..anyways...I wasn't exactly me..I was always quiet and what not..and he'd always what was wrong. I tried to push him away, knowing he'd get hurt. But instead he just stood beside me now matter how hard I pushed. Then one day I realize..maybe I could really trust him. As time went on..we became closer than anyone else. I trusted him a lot, my trust isn't easy. I was able to sadly..but true..I was able to replace him with my other best friend whom I've known for 10 years now..but she drifted and called me her best friend when it was convint for her..anyways..we told each other stuff about each other that you would never think..and we were able to call each other best friends..by late March..I realized I liked him (how ironic...)...and he discovered mid-April...but we didn't let that destroy our friendship...and I was able to forget about it..and my feelings went away..or so I thought..till June..where it all started up..I saw him twice..the whole summer..the begining of July and the begining of Sept. anyways...I still like him..and he knows it. Lately I've had it with it all..since it hurts so much. I don't want him either...I won't date my close friends because I'm too afaird to loose them from what I've had in the past with just friendships alone..anyways I was on the phone with him..and I finally came out and said I didn't think I could be friends anymore. But the only thing is...he suggested we stopped talking for a bit so I can hopefully let go. I said I don't know if I could do that. Since, if we stop talking for a while..we are gonna drift...and not only will I hopefully let go..but I'm going to loose my best friend. He said I'd have to choose which I wanted. But I'm not exactly sure what to do. Or if there is a way out of this...and I can let go and still have my best friend. I don't fall easily either. Friend wise...I have 4 best friends (2 girls and 2 guys)...1 one is in almost a different time zone..so it's hard..and the other 2..they are pretty awesome, but I don't have the trust and the comfort this one gives me. He'll focus on me when I really need the attention and/or the help, he'll do anything to get me to laugh. I really don't know what to do. :(
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You need to take a chance with this guy. Why would you want a friendship when you can have so much more? By dating him you wouldn't be ruining a friendship, you'd be forming and even stronger bond. Even if it didn't last, you could totally be friends after. He's right though. You do need to make a choice. There's no way around that. Choice A is go out with him and have it maybe not work. Choice B is end the friendship without even trying. Why would you even consider choice B? Either choice could end with the loss of a friend, but at least with choice A you would have experienced something great too. Why wouldn't you want to go out with him? If you never took any risks in life you wouldn't get anywhere. You can have a great love and great memories with this guy (he seems really awesome and perfect for you) or you can just skate by and not feel anything. Sure you won't feel any pain, but you won't feel any love either. Even if love ends painfully, the pain is a good pain because it means you experienced something wonderful. I'd rather live my life with great highs and terrible lows than not feel anything at all. And who's saying it will end terribly and you'll be full of pain? It might not ever end at all. I wish you the best of luck with this guy. I know you'll make great memories with him he seems super sweet and he's totally into you. :)
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