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If life was so easy then wht else could i ask for...here's my story...my dad died when i was 3 years old....my mom married this other guy...and after which it so happened that i was the non exiting daughter.....my mom dint love me at all coz then she has two more children with this new guy...now i am married to this guy i loved he was rich famous and everything you can ask for....but now there are some problems, coz his family did not accept...me i left my mom coz of this guy and now i facing critising from everyone ....wht do i do...who do i talk with ...cant go back to my mom coz now i think she hates me...every one hates me....they just want to change me. Why any one does not accept me the way i am.??
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First off, accept yourself for who you are! Life is never perfect and you dont always get perfect people as your family. However, although it is a hard hand to play, you were dealt it for a reason because youre a strong enough person to take it (and although it may seem unfair, In the bigger picture, it was given to you so that you could learn a certain lesson in life) I as well lost my dad when I was young from suicide, although my experience is not the same as yours, i do understand that losing one and then the life that follows is very difficult. Your mom does love you but she is probablly unaware of how you feel about the way she treats you in comparison to the rest (her other kids) Its hard because you expect them to know better but some people just aren't as conscious or aware of others and their feelings even if to us, we think it should come naturally to them) We all weren't given perfect parents to some degree and its hard when you are more consciously aware of the right thing to do than your own mom. Even with your problems between you too, it never hurts to be the bigger person (although sometimes you don't want to) but knowing you were will give you peace of mind. Life could end tomorrow so make sure you fix what needs to be fixed and say what needs to be said, so in the end, you will be content with your actions. I believe time is never too late to mend a relationship especially when its your mom. She may not be perfect, but in this life our family is the only most permanent thing we have and although you cant force their actions you can at least let it be known to your mom that her actions and behaviour have affected you in a negative way. You should get this out so you have no regrets in the future of the relationship that was lost between you and your mom. I guarantee you she does love you but she just needs to know how she is making you feel so she can make a change and improve your mother/daughter relationship. If she doesnt, dont be discouraged because then that is her mistake and she'll know this eventually. Meanwhile, you're still not alone and there is lots of love and a meaningful life for you to discover. Now, if this guy truly loves you then he will not leave your side even if his family dissaproves. First off however, you deserve to know why they don't approve of you and especially if it's for superficial reasons than he should stay with you no matter what. If he doesn't then he wasnt the one for you and that man of your dreams is still out there waiting to make you happy, so, don't let this get you down because time heals and happiness waits for when you are able to discover it again. If he is staying with you and loves you but its JUST his family that is having a hard time accepting you, then the only one who really matters is your husband and the love he has for you. No one else should matter. The family's issues should resolve in time once they see how happy you make their son and that your love is really true love. But like I said, you deserve to know why they don't like you and should try to make it work with his family and if they don't come to see what a wonderful girl you are then that's their loss. You did all you can do, and in the end you were the person with integrity and strength when all others have sank below your level. Moreover, you are who you are and you shouldn't change anything (that is if youre a good person at heart... If you did something wrong then certainly you should change the element where you went wrong but that's beside the point.) Many times, you may think its too late or people hate you when its not the truth, so don't come to believe what you dont know as a fact. SO, continue to act with integrity and try to fix what relationships are broken and if you find they are unfixable then go get yourself something new in your life that will make you happy. Love is never hard to find, you just have to be patient and look for it when it comes. MOst important thing to remember, is love yourself!
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I think first and foremost I should say no-one ever said life was going to be easy. It never is and I doubt, with how things are delevoping in the world, it will be getting any easier as time goes by.
If you feel you need to get in touch with all these people and try fix things with them then by all means you should try. The worst that can happen is that they won't want to know and if that's the case then it really is their loss. Many people are too proud to admit they are wrong so your mom may never admit she was in the wrong or want to make the first move and come to you, all because of pride. Try calling her sometime just to say hi and see how it goes. Say hello and ask how she is and just say you were thinking about her and wanted to call to ask how she had been and if you can both not be such strangers... see how it goes. As I said the worst can happen is she won't want to know.
Why did your husbands family not accept you? All you can really do here, again, is try to connect with them and try to talk and get along with them. Again, at least you will have tried if nothing more. Maybe even talking to your husband about this might be a good idea and explaining to him how you want to at least try and get along with his family even if they didn't accept you and him being together and see what he says about it and work something out from there. You and him are going to be together now for good (fingers crossed) so his family will need to accept you at some point or another and face the facts of you both being together, whether they like it or not.
As for people wanting to change you, how do you mean they are trying to change you? Sometimes we have to put up with people but straight out changing who you are for people, just for their acceptance, seems like the wring thing to do. They should accept you for who you are. As for why they just don't I have no idea so I can't really shed any light on that, sorry. I really hope you manage to get things fixed and sorted out though. Remember one thing though not everyone hates you, that's never true. It may seem sometimes like everyone does but believe me its never the case. :]
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