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parent's ocd is ruining life
My life is really messed up. My mom has severe OCD and she basically ruins my life. She's a great person, although slightly annoying, but living with her is hell. My house is a mess because shes a packrat. We keep collecting junk. I can never have friends over because there's no where for us to hang around. They think my family is like part of the CIA or something cause I've never invited them over. I never have any place to work or do my homework. My parents are way too overprotective and never let me do anything normal teens can do like walk uptown or get dropped off at the movies. I'm not allowed to date until I'm a senior and even then its looked down upon. Once a guy friend called my house and she totally spazzed. & associating with guys outside of school is out of the question. My mom always nags me and has these random outbursts of crying and yelling. Plus she has a bunch of crap wrong with her, so she can't do much physically. Yet she does all of the laundry, dishes, and cleaning because she insists that i'll do it wrong-- the ocd. But then she complains when I don't help her. Most people i know couldn't deal with the shit I go through. She does stuff that moms arent supposed to do, like starts crying in the middle of a store for no reason, yells at me in public for the littlest things and insults me with terms such as bitch, whore, etc, and says it seriously. I've had an eating disorder for almost 2 years now and she hasn't even noticed. Don't tell me its bad, i Know, its not like I'm dying or underweight. I can stop whenever I want to. Anyway im basically wondering if anyone knows someone that behaves like my mom or has OCD that can help me deal with this, cause I just can't take it anymore. She deinies her probs & wont go on meds, so a psych. is out of the question.
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I think you should tell a school counselor about your eating disorder and the stressors that trigger your behavior. If you mention the name calling, the counselor is obligated to report it to Child Protective Services as it is abuse. That's the best way I can see of you getting what you need: family counseling. Your mother is obviously mentally ill, your father is apparently afraid to rock the boat because he's letting her illnesses consume her. From what you've described, I'm not sure it's OCD, though it may be, but she seems to have a problem with hoarding and anger problems and possibly bipolar disorder. She needs help and won't get any better until she can see what her behavior is doing to her family and her life. Don't your mother's doctors notice that she has not only physical but also mental problems? If there were some way to communicate with them, they might be able to get your mom the help she needs, but I don't know how you would do that without convincing your dad to speak with the doctors or something.
Whatever happens with her, you should make a committment to yourself not to let her behavior make you hurt yourself. So reform your bad eating habits and commit to keeping yourself strong and healthy so that you can grow up to someday have a daughter whom you will raise totally differently from what your parents have raised you. Take care of yourself now so that you have a future you can enjoy someday.
Sabine
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How old are you? If you're almost graduating, I'd recommend just dealing with your problems for a bit longer and then escape your hell.
If you can't wait that long, I'd recommend talking to a school counselor or child services. There will be a lot of shit that will happen. For starters, they'll see that your mom find therapy or else they'll take you away from her, but I think any household would be better than the one you currently live in. If you have any good friends, they might take you in for a while.
What is your dad like?
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