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my mom and my style
turned 13 recently. my mom and i do not get along at all anymore. she hates my friends music clothes me and just how i act. my friends are all i love not my family not my mom not my cousins nothing and nobody else. so my mom makes fun of my friends and says everything she thinks is wrong with them and how they dress and all about them. then i try to get her to stop she talks over me so i cant say anything then i yell then she yells then im grounded. then she says 'o i dont care what you do do whatever you want' then i do then a little while later she get even madder about it. everything i wear that is red purple black brown she gets mad and yells till i change. my jewelry she tells me to take it off then the next day after school its gone she takes my stuff. she tells me to burn things that I like and I wear. im screaming and crying more than ever. but when im around my friends im fine. their gothic their parents let them wear what they want. i cant even get the side bangs. my friend had them and died her hair redish brown it even mainly looks brown its not bad at all. her parents let her. shes having confirmation soon even. i told my mom then she starts saying thats stupid her parents are wrong for letting her do that thats just sick. my ears closed up i want my ears either double repeirced on the lobe or on the cartlidge. my other friends mom asked her if she wanted hers but she said no her mom asked her daughter. WTF! why does it matter how i dress! now its to the point i have to hide my music i add songs i hate in a folder like glamorous and stuff like that then a folder for the music i like like evanescence and the used and stuff like that and i erased the names on all of them their just numbered. last time she heard it she freaked out yelling at me. then i hide my jewelry in a locked box saying pictures. my friends saw me cry for the first time yesterday. they know about my mom so they came over wearing preppy junk and tried acting different for me so my mom would leave me and them alone. my mom said clothes doesnt make a person. so they said ya so why does it matter its just clothes. my mom said but MY clothes do matter. so all the yelling in my life is for nothing because clothes dont matter. but its who i am its what i like its my body not hers. gothic is another stereotype just like preppy is. my brother is preppy so he gets all he wants. my mom is trying to change me she wants me to dress like a slut all the clothes she gets for me. my Best friend is a guy which can never ever comeover hes even a prep. everyone makes fun of me family cousins strangers and people at school. i can cut my hair it wouldnt help i could cut my wrists just might again deep id be quicker. but im guessing my moms rule is NO friends fun or freedom. ive been going trough this for about 2 years she will not budge i will not either. i will never give up. i tell her all this like one thing everyday till im sent to my room then refuse then get grounded. if she yells ill yell i even told her that. i act calm she yells then i do. i say how prep and goth are both just stereotypes how their just names and how she gives him everything because its a different name. i go through too much for anyone to go through. i only act tough because id be dead 2 years ago if i didnt. i cant get a therepist or even talk to my mom or write what else is there to do before i die and shell never even care. there is no way of ''kindly'' doing anything to her she just wont let me.
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You need to talk to your mother about this. Try to compromise with her.
Tell her you don't dress this way to piss her off, but it's a self expression, a style that you like. Tell her you don't wanna be a clone of everyone else. You want to stand out, be different & daring. You want new things, and new experiences. Tell your mother you want life.
Talk to her calmly. Don't scream, don't get an attitude, don't yell, and don't get mad. If you do that, you're at a 100% garuntee that nothing will work out. Nothing will change, and she will not even begin to see where you're coming from.
Don't change for anyone. Don't change for your mother. Don't change for friends. Don't change for guys. Don't change for family. Don't change for anyone but yourself. If you change for other people, you'd be fake, & you wouldn't be true to yourself. Do what makes you happy, & live the way you want.
Don't do anything dumb. Don't cut yourself. If you need to vent, start a livejournal or find a friend to talk to. If you feel like you're being a burden, let them know before hand. Chances are, you're not. Everyone has problems, and everyone needs help.
Good luck with your mother.
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Hi.
Goth is not a sterotype.
Its a belief. Thats probably why your mom is freaking out. If you are going for the "goth" style, just call it punk.
Anyways, attempt to write your mom a letter. Tell her the way you dress only because you do not want to be a carbon copy of everyone else. Tell her that you are not trying to do anything other than look like your own person. Let her know that you want her to understand. Tell her you don't like arguing/yelling at her, and that you are only trying to get your point across that you are only trying to be yourself, not a carbon copy fake person.
If it really bothers you that much, talk to your dad. Or call the police or child protection on her.
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