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Popular!!!
Since i have been dating my boyfriend i kind of have distanced myself from my friends. I want to stop doing that and get my friends back. But in addition to that i want to be popular. I want to have alot of friends. How can i do that?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
How to Be Popular:
Steps:
Evaluate the reasons why you want to become popular. Do you just want to fit in? Are you trying to impress other people and be accepted into a certain clique, or are you trying to make more friends and improve your enjoyment in life? There are many different ways to become popular, and many things you'll need to do--are those worth the benefits of being popular?
Be comfortable with yourself and present a confident image. It will be much easier to have others see that and want to be around you. Once you are comfortable with being alone and happy with who you are, it’ll be easier to make friends.
Create your style. While many of the popular kids may wear the same kinds of clothes and have the same haircuts, this does not mean that simply changing these things about yourself will make you popular. Don’t go overboard with style changes, as it will only make you look like you are trying too hard. Instead, look at your hair and clothing as a chance to present yourself in the best light. Maybe a new, shorter haircut will help you to show off your eyes and smile, or that fashionable pair of jeans is just the confidence booster you’ve been looking for. A change can be a powerful thing. Tailor the latest trends to your own ideas, and put forth an image that makes you feel good.
Take pride in your appearance and stay in shape. If you’re trying to attract people to you, being clean is a definite plus. Showering every day, as well as using deodorant and cleaning your ears, etc, is an easy way to maintain yourself as someone people won’t mind being around. People don't like smelly people. Washing your face regularly is also recommended, as it will be important to put your best face forward, and acne can definitely bring down your confidence level. For girls, makeup can be an option.
Get involved. One of the easiest ways to meet people is to participate in school activities, such as athletic teams, community service projects, or artistic groups. Being part of a group automatically fosters some formation of relationships, and can give you the added confidence you need to feel popular. Don’t be worried about whether a certain group is cool or not; choose something that fits your interests and talents, and eventually people will recognize you for the good qualities you have. You don’t need to be a cheerleader or football player to be popular.
Don't be shy. Knowing your answers in class is not nerdy. In fact, you'll become more popular in class, which in turn will make you more popular elsewhere. Show your talents. Especially, show the ones people would never imagine you have. This will help you achieve success, popularity and more people might find interest on you. If a large group of people feel you will become famous for your talents, this is an amazingly fast way to increase popularity and especially recognition in your school. But don't boast. Stay humble.
Be assertive and outgoing. Friends aren’t just going to throw themselves at you, especially not if you’ve had a not-so-popular image for years. Even if you are naturally shy, you’re going to have to come out of your shell a little bit and put yourself in social situations. Don’t be afraid to go and sit at a new table at lunch, or strike up a conversation with the person next to you in study hall.
Start talking. Talk to at least 3 new people every day. Even if it's just, 'Hey, I don't get this math problem, do you?', it will still help, and remember to always smile when talking to them. When you strike up a conversation, don't always be wondering what the other person is thinking, then something negative will get across. While you maybe thinking "Wow, I sound so geeky," your face could be saying "I don't want to talk to this freak." Avoid thinking about whether or not you’re "cool" enough to talk to a certain person; rather, let that person see why they should want to talk to you.
Share something about yourself - it doesn't have to be big, just funny incidents or mishaps that will make people laugh (and not totally creep them out). Believe it or not, laughter often makes people feel more comfortable around you - making it more likely that they'll recall you as someone they'll like to hang around with.
Develop relationships. As you begin to meet people, don’t just treat them as items on a checklist. Find out what they like to do, their interests, and learn about them as people. Give out as many or even more compliments than you receive. The reality is that people aren't really that interested in you--they're interested in themselves. So don't try to act interesting to get other people's attention, act interested in them! You’re trying to make friends, not just be known.
Mingle. Be sure to keep in touch with your old friends—you don’t want them to think you’ve forgotten about them just because you’re making new ones. Don't just hang out with one group all the time, either. Try and alternate a fair amount between the groups, so that people get the impression that you can get along with everyone. Don’t exclude anyone. Enemies and popularity don't mix.
Jump in the pool. Or do something else unexpected. What this means is, sometimes to get yourself noticed, you may have to put yourself out there in ways you hadn’t considered. Maybe this means going up and talking to the girl no one else will, or dancing crazily at the next formal. Let yourself go. You’ll be surprised how good it can make you feel, and how people respect a person who goes against the crowd and does what s/he wants. Make sure you don’t just become a ‘novelty’ who amuses others with his/her antics, however.
Don’t think too hard. Being popular is as much a state of mind as anything else. If people see you trying too hard to be popular, they will usually dismiss your efforts. Popularity, in the end, is only partly about how others see you. Your reputation may fade and change over time, and the only thing you can/should do about that is stay absolutely true to yourself. Take these tips for your personal benefit (not in a greedy, manipulative way.) Just continue to believe in yourself, and it won’t be long before others follow your lead.
Tips:
Talk to your parents about the changes you are making in your life, and explain your reasoning to them. They are likely to be concerned that their child is acting differently.
If you have curfews or rules that frustrate you and you think hinder you from doing the "popular" things, remember that even the coolest kids have parents and rules. Hey, give your parents a break once in awhile for trying- use that Friday night at home to catch up on magazine reading or even homework.
Be a good student. It is a common misperception that if you’re doing well in school, you’re a nerd. You can be popular and keep a high grade point average.
Leave some time just for you. Once you are popular, you may be busy with a lot of friends and activities. Make sure you still have time to be alone and reflect.
One rule is "never be embarrassed". Embarrassment shows weakness. It's okay to show emotions, but not weakness. Let those awkward moments pass you by like they're nothing but another era of your life. (Extra Comment: It's not necessarily bad to be embarrassed - it may happen at some point whether you like it or not. But the way you handle it can be even more important than what happens. Accept whatever happened, focus on how to avoid it, and forgive and forget. It will happen to everyone in time. Either way, you learned something for yourself.)
Summer is a great time to work on some of these changes. You can exercise outdoors so you look better and change your hair and style. You can also more easily sever ties with anyone you'd like to distance yourself from.
Warnings:
Realize that your popularity will not get you through college, and may fade very quickly after high school. Popularity as a teen is no guarantee of popularity as an adult. Likewise, unpopular teens often grow up into popular adults. Many times in life the people you call nerds in school you'll call boss at work.
Don’t do dangerous/stupid things in order to become popular, such as smoking, drinking, drunk driving, or illegal drugs. You’ll only be putting yourself at risk, and none of these things will make people think you are cool. Though you might temporarily appear cool to people who have problem-laden lives, you might be in danger.
Don't let people use you. Sometimes popular kids accept a new person just because they are rich and generous, or smart and nice enough to help them. If you let them tread over you, then you'll never be truly part of the group.
Do realize that being popular has its downsides. If you wish to be left alone, stick with being part of smaller groups, but who knows? Maybe you will find the far reaches of popularity your kind of thing.
Popularity may make you some enemies or rivals. Do not be humiliated by them or angered, try to understand them. If they don't mellow down, then they are either harassing you and should be reported or whatever, or are just very helpless and do not need to be bothered more. Just be friendly, and keep out of their bubble. Then they will probably stay out of yours.
Myspace, when used carelessly, can be a very dangerous website. Be careful how much info you give out on it.
Don't be dependent on your popularity.
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To be popular everyone knows you. wether its good or bad, thats up to you.
try sitting at a different table every day, joining in on class conversations with people you dont know. and build on that, its not that hard & good luck.
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Hi,
I used to always want to be popular and have everyone like me. But i realized that my friends i have now may not be the popular kids in shool but they are to me and you should just stick with your friends. being popular isnt everything. Having friends is more important and do you really think that popular kids are really your friends they may act like it but alot of popular people are hated. Maybe you need to see that for your self but if you decide to go back to your friends they might not be their and you need to think about that. If you like your friends then stick with them dont care about anything else and if your bf is coming between you guys then he isnt worth it because your friends and your family are always there for you all your life. NOT SOME GUY! believe me i learned that the hard way and maybe you do too but please dont make a mistake and forget about your friends. Like i said they are the closet thing you got! So i think you should just forget about being popular and hangout with teh people that care about you the most. if your bf doesnt like your friends or doesnt want you to hangout with them then he needs to get oout of your life because their the only ones that will be there for you when your down! Ok well i hope i helped ya out! :] and if you need anymore help im here!
xoxo
~katelyn~
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