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my grandma is getting on my last nerve.
she can remember how my mom dated john stamos, & other stuff like that, like ill be watching full house & my grandma will be like.. oh your mom dated him. but then yet, she acts like she can't remember my name sometimes?!
how do i put up with this?
& do you think she just does it for attention?
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No. I very highly doubt she does it for attention. It sounds like she is likely suffering from some sort of problem that causes memory loss. Alzheimer's Disease? I don't know, because I'm not a doctor. I just know it sounds kind of like what my own grandma is going through.
It's like this: elderly people who suffer from memory loss can remember some things as if it happened yesterday, and other things slip their mind- they just forget. Often times this memory loss can get progressively worse. It is a very sad thing for them and for those who witness their decline.
Try not to let it get on your nerves, because she can't help it; it isn't her fault. She doesn't intend to forget your name, I promise.
Let me tell you a story about my own grandma and my experiences with her and her memory loss. I don't know how effected your grandma is at this time, but mine is not in very good shape at all. Her memory is bad and getting worse.
Sorry that this may be long, but it is the only way I know how to give you an idea of what may be going on with your grandma, how to cope with it, and what you may be able to do to make your time spent with her special and memorable. :)
Before I got married in October, I was my grandma's caretaker for a while. She recalls the past so easily, but usually not what happened yesterday.
She loves to talk about her past, and all of the good times she had growing up, raising her family, going on vacations, and fond memories of times spent with her grandchildren.
Talking about her memories of happy times is her way of taking her mind off of the fact that she is unwell in the present, and unhappy about her state of health. I encourage her to tell me about her experiences in her past, because she really enjoys telling those stories.
I love listening to her step back into her past; into a better time for her. It makes her laugh and feel good, and that in turn makes me feel good. I miss seeing her feel happy, and I take in every happy moment I witness her having now.
A lot of times, she can't remember my name, either. Just like your grandma. This is always hard for me and makes me very sad. I happened to be her only granddaughter out of her many grandchildren until I neared the end of highschool. I was always very close with her, but her memory loss causes her to forget who I am a lot of times. She calls me by a different name a lot.
It hurts that after all of these years of being her special girl, she can no longer call me by the right name. But I lay no blame on her or take no offence by it. She isn't at fault and she honestly can't help it. She doesn't mean to.
It breaks my heart that she is going through this. I want to help her. I want to fix her brain so she can remember like she used to. I would cut off both of my arms and legs if it could possibly make it so she can live her life like she used to; that is what she wants most of all- to be her old self again.
She suffers from Parkinson's Disease, and she is going down hill. I don't know if the disease is what is effecting her memory, or if it is something else. I just know she is in a bad state, and if I could, I would pay any cost to make her well again.
But the fact is that I can't fix it. There is nothing I can do but be supportive and understanding. All I can do when she forgets my name and calls me by some other name is answer her and speak to her as if that is my name. I could never correct her and tell her that isn't my name. For her to actually realize that she forgot my name would only make her feel worse than she already feels on a daily basis.
I think she is depressed because of the state of her health, and I would never think to add to that depression. I just accept the new name she has given me and forget it. I know she doesn't intend to call me by a different name. It was never her intention to forget my name like that.
It's hard to cope with at times, but I always keep in mind that she is still my beloved grandma and she always will be. I know that she knows who I am deep down inside, but she just doesn't remember very often. She can't help it, just as your grandma can't. It isn't her fault, just as it isn't your grandma's fault. Our grandma's would never forget us intentionally.
I know that my grandma's situation may differ greatly from your grandma's situation, but I know they have that one thing in common- memory loss. Such a devastating thing to happen to a person.
My grandma may be in a worse state than yours, or maybe vise versa, but the simple fact remains that their memories are slipping away from them.
I'm sure that your grandma is equally as sad about it as mine is, weather she says it out loud or not. Nobody wants to forget their loved ones, and when that happens it is depressing for that person.
My advice to you is to try to make your time spent with your grandma as happy as possible for both of you. Remember that her time on this earth is running short. I know that may not be what you want to hear, but it is a fact we all have to face in our own time. I'm facing that fact right now, hard as it may be to do.
Spend quality time with her whenever you can and talk to her about whatever makes you both feel good. You don't want to feel regrets of lost time- it hurts your heart too much.
I hope that I didn't bore the soup out of you, and again, I apologize for how incredibly long this is.
I hope that what I said makes sense to you, and I truly hope that my shared experience helps you in some way.
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ok .
well i have to ask .
did your mom really go out with john stamos .
if so
thats cool
she could have alzheimers where she is slowly losing her memory
or she could be doing it for attention
just talk to her more often
and ask her if she wants to go on a walk
or play a game
or go shopping
or hit the movies
whatever
just try to hangout with her
just try and make her day
=]
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