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Totally Confused
okay so i like this guy that is alot older then me,but he has a job,and a car,and lives with my brother in law cuz its his cousin.I know im not aloud to date this guy,but i really lioke him and would be willing to keep it a secret.2 days ago when he dropped me off at my house,i said "you shouldnt punish me just becuse i was born later then you",and he leaned over and kissed me.Then yesterday i was whispering to him across he room"so what ae we doing"and he just shrugged his shoulders at me.im not sure if he knew what was taking about or not.how is a good way to ask him?
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Here's what you're doing: you're flirting with disaster.
That's not a slam against the guy; I'm sure he's a very decent person. But you are unable to date him, as you say, and to ask him to date you in secret is just plain not fair.
Consider the consequences for you if you get caught dating him: you get in trouble with your parents, most likely. Not really a big deal.
If HE gets caught dating you, though, he faces major consequences. People will look at him like some kind of pervert, for being involved with someone so much younger than himself. It could cause a major family rift. Your brother-in-law will probably be very upset, and it might affect his relationship with his wife (presumably, your sister). YOU won't be blamed for much; after all, you're "just a kid" and not expected to know any better. He will be blamed for everything.
If you really like him, then don't put him in such a position. Go ahead and tell him about your feelings and that the kiss was great, but have the maturity to realize that it has to end there.
For now, that is. Once you're over 18, I'd say he's fair game. At that point, the way to ask him is to approach him and say, "I'm all grown up now, and I still think you're hot. Let's go out sometime."
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