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possessive boyfriend
I am from India. My sister(24) is in her final semester studying homeopathy.she was in love with her schoolmate for the past 5 years but has finally decided to call quits. She says he is a practical,insensitive kind who considers emotions to be unnecessary and money is everything bcause of which he spends nil time with her and working so that they would have a better married life. All these years she put up with his attitude and was completely devoted to him.but as her disagreement grew she complained to him about his insensitivity to her to which he had the same story of earning money.since 6 months she has been constantly asking him to break off and has finally stopped talking to him.but now he is raving and crying about asking to give him a second chance and talking about suicide.he has stopped working and trying to drain her emotionally.my sis has another friend of 3 months who became quite intimate with her during these months and has proposed her to which she accepted.since her ex is now showing tantrums and talking about suicide.What should she do?
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Good for her for leaving.
His ideas of being insensitive and spending his time working for money for their marriage is not doing her any good. In fact, that is probably exactly what her married life would be like if she stayed with him. He can't make a happy marriage with her with money alone. He has to be there for her and spend time with her.
Her best bet would be to stay clear away from him; do not even speak to him. Most likely, the only reasons he is saying these things to her is to get her to come back. You said he was trying to drain her emotionally. He is trying to get some kind of mind control over her. He is no good.
She needs to be completely devoted to a man who gives her the same respect. Her ex is not that man.
As for him using suicide to win her back, that's just too bad for him. That is NOT her fault he feels that way. She should NEVER go back with him because he makes her feel guilty like that. If she does, her life will never be a happy one.
Tell her if she is happy with her new friend, stay with him. And tell her to please stop getting anywhere near the ex. He is only out to make her feel bad. If she does not see him or talk to him, he can not throw tantrums and make her feel guilty.
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none of this is her fault, its the boys, if he is talking about suicide than he needs to get help or go see a psychologist but she shouldn't feel guilty for his feelings. maybe he has a chemical imbalance in his brain. she should alert him of his childish behavior and if he continues with his suicidal tak he could be admitted into a mental institute and while it sounds cruel i'd rather admit someone to an institute than see them die.
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